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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Why does texting seem such a big deal?

7 replies

hiphoplollipop30 · 16/01/2017 12:50

Hello,

I met someone while I was in Paris over NYE and we went on a great first date. He texted the next day saying hope you have a safe flight etc I'll be in touch when I'm in London at the end of January (we'd discussed that he'd be here then).

Cool. Fine. Just got on with things as you do.

I thought of him a few days later and texted him, he replied instantly and enthusiastically.

I did the same about a week later, same result.

I don't really want to text much because it feels a bit pointless, I'll just see him when I see him? I'm not expecting anything but genuinely looking forward to hanging out again, and I'll be in Paris in Feb.

He doesn't initiate texts, but replies instantly. I know some will say if he's not initiating he's not interested - and it hadn't crossed my mind until today.

Whats appropriate for this situation? Is appropriate even the word?

Trying to stop my mind from wandering and thinking "he's not into you". Your mind /thoughts can be your own worst enemy sometimes.

I replied to his text last night with a question, he read it at 3am, and no reply yet. I don't feel panicked but hmmmm those doubtful thoughts are creeping in.

Need a slap I think!

OP posts:
TheNaze73 · 16/01/2017 12:53

You do need a slap Wink

I wouldn't sweat the small stuff with texting. Use it to set up dates & that's it.

hiphoplollipop30 · 16/01/2017 14:20

Just found out I'm going to be in Paris for work at the end of this week - do I ignore my last text to him and the no reply when I text about this or make a joke and say I'll be in town?

Wow, am I 12?

OP posts:
Shoxfordian · 16/01/2017 14:28

He's not showing you that he really wants to make a plan or hear from you

I think if you hear from him before you go to Paris for work then let him know you'll be there and if not just leave it

Adora10 · 16/01/2017 14:45

Ball's in his court to contact you OP, don't make another contact until he replies, he's already read your previous text; doesn't sound great to me though.

hiphoplollipop30 · 16/01/2017 15:06

He texted.

Massive eyeroll @ me.

Overthinking is the root of all evil!

OP posts:
rememberthetime · 16/01/2017 15:30

In these situations I always go with not playing games. there's no rules - just be yourself. If you want to text him, then do. Do you think he is analysing when or if to contact you? Just do what you want to do and he can deal with it as he feels works best for him.

hiphoplollipop30 · 16/01/2017 15:56

Yeah I'd agree with that, just tricky when someone is abroad.

We obviously can't see each other so if he was in London and we weren't making plans to see each other I'd just forget about it.

OP posts:
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