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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Money and online dating

9 replies

Newbrummie · 15/01/2017 16:53

I'm hoping this isn't common and I'm sure Mumsnetters would see through this but for the 2nd time I've been asked for a substantial amount of money from a man I met online - not involved with at all, met 9 months ago and he's just popped back up to let me know he's had a nervous breakdown hence the ghosting and could I give/lend him £3,000
Now I'm trying not to be unkind but obviously I'm not parting with any money, £3 nevermind £3,000 but dies this happen a lot ?

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Zaphodsotherhead · 15/01/2017 16:55

Had you ever met this man - ie, was it a proper profile of a real person or the OLD equivalent of the American army widower that crops up on Facebook perpetually? Not a real potential dating person, just someone trying to scam women?

Newbrummie · 15/01/2017 16:57

One of them yes, the £3000 one I'd met and we went to the movies, drinks, dinner etc. He paid.
The other was quite an obvious scam but the 2nd I think is just bloody strange

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RoundTheBend · 15/01/2017 17:00

I have reported people like this before. I actually know one woman who had an online relationship with a man (said he was a doctor) for about 9 months. Rang her quite a few times, sent messages and flowers etc. Then asked her for £10,000 for some phoney reason or another. Quite broke her heart as she felt she was really in love with him even though they had never actually met in real life. Turns out he was using someone else's photo, made up all his life, told her what she wanted to hear etc.

Bananalanacake · 15/01/2017 17:01

Just tell him you don't have any money to lend him, if he is genuine he will understand.

Newbrummie · 15/01/2017 17:06

He wasn't a French othopedic surgeon was he Round ?

I instantly clocked that one when he claimed to be working with UNICEF on a contract that payment was sent until after the contract was completed. As bloody if.

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Newbrummie · 15/01/2017 17:07

Bananalanacake I'm with somebody else now so it's just not happening and I don't care what he thinks of me ... but it's not nice

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Zaphodsotherhead · 15/01/2017 17:12

Surely, if he were genuine, he would never have asked? There would have to be other people to borrow from (including the bank) before asking a random women you've only met a couple of times!

Bananalanacake · 15/01/2017 18:37

Glad you've got a new man. I lap up these sorts of stories in 'Take a Break', fascinates me that women (and men) get suckered in. I often think about setting up a OLD account to taunt anyone who tries to scam me, (think it's called baiting) but my IT expert DP will find out and not be very happy.

Newbrummie · 15/01/2017 18:42

It's a minefield... shame the police aren't more interested in it. Quite cleverly done, the French man started by asking for iTune cards. Small amounts ... I didn't have the money so it was a no from me but then predictably the request for airfare followed quite soon afterwards along with him
Being blocked. Can see how it happens though

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