My husband hat s me

[Mooogles]

I honestly don't know what to do.

Tonight he has turned on me in a way I can't understand. Don't want to drip feed. We had had lots of issues with his family hating me. They are from another country and I have tried to get along with their customs. I am a shy person and don't speak the language.
It has been hard and I thought we had turned a corner. But after a few beers tonight he told me that he can't bear to tolerate my behaviour any more. I have tried so hard. He says I don't listen and am causing him so much pain. I don't think I have done anything and I think it is alcohol talking. But fuck, I haven't done anything. We have massive financial issue. I do complain about them, but otherwise, o try to be relaxed.

My phone won't let me correct the title! But you get what I mean....

Sorry to hear that OP. What does he feel you have done?

He is asleep now. But he is drunk, and he feels I don't want to spend time with his family and daughter. And to be honest, now I know they hate me, he is right. So I do avoid it. But as with lots of things, it is not straightforward. I don't know... but I feel like I am in a situation where I was expecting to be married to someone who I though was organised and had a lovely family. But now I feel, a few years later, I am with someone who has a 70k debt, and a family who hate me. Not what it said in the tin!!!!

But thank you misstic for replying to my very full post!

Sorry that you're going through this, I don't have anything valuable to offer. I am in NC with my family due to a myriad of problems and them not accepting DH, and have no regrets. Extended family relations are complicated and just wanted to give you some support

That's a horrible situation to be in, would you be able to talk to him about it when he's calm and sober? Have you thought about how you're going to handle it?

Breezy - yes it is complicated. Wish things could be simple.
Cakes -I am going to try to talk to him, but things are so bad now and have been for so long I find myself longing to be single (with my kids). I know it sounds trivial, but him being such an aggressive arse tonight has made me think actually I should just leave him. I have tried so many times. And not to be boring, but he always brings the issues back to this. But MY issues are his debts, lies and stupidity. And I need to move onwards.

It sounds like he's trying to blame you for the problems when in fact it's all his doing and his family unreasonable feelings towards you . If he's making you unhappy and talks to you like that then yes, consider splitting up. Are your children his?