Atenco I disagree, obviously I don't know OPs ex but I think you can get pleasure in looking after your children even want more but if they have a schedule then you can get annoyed they don't want to keep yo ot especially if last minute, there are literally 1000's of posts on MN about parents getting pissed off because the other parent has decided they can't parent their child that time.
Also with the babysitting as they are split up during the times they're with OP obviously he has some parental responsibility but the majority of the day to day care is meant to be OPs responsibility. but at the time I wrote it I was under the impression OP wanted to go out seems she didn't so if it's a general attitude of when he spends time with his children that is unacceptable but if it's meant to be her time to parent her children but she wanted a night out to get pissed and wanted him to have the children to look after she would have been using him as a babysitting replacement, hence a cheap babysitter. he could see it as parenting but the service he would be replacing would be a babysitter.
SVJAA I didn't say she couldn't have a break I was under the assumption that they had times scheduled when they both had their DC, as such If OP wanted him to parent their children on her scheduled time it would be her that wasn't letting him have a break (if it was all equal).but I didn't say it was out of order either for her to want him to have the children I just think people get hung up on this babysitting term and it doesn't actually help OP to focus on that.
And I still don't think from when I wrote my comments I was wrong as I took it she wanted to go out and so in that scenario I doubt she was doing it out the goodness of her heart oh I'll give the ex some time to see his dc so I'll go out, more I want to go out babysitting is expensive so I'll ask the DF to look after the DC not on his scheduled time hence literally cheap babysitter, he could see it as parenting but still being used as a cheap babysitting alternative as it's not that she wanted to just give him time with DC but because she needed someone to look after the DC whilst she went out.
There's tons of threads about parents being annoyed that the other parent can't do their scheduled parental time. After I logged off MN it seems she didn't want to go out and if he sees anytime he sees his DC as that then yes I agree it's not acceptable but At the time of writing I didn't have that information.
this thread was asking for counter arguments yet everybody has focused on the term babysitter if anything I'm one if not the only poster that has offered some actual advice about counter arguments.
SaltySeaDog I've explained above
Springy wasn't too poncy - didn't need you to explain it to me. I'm not full of shit thanks.
Not many counter arguments the OP wanted, lots focusing on the babysitting terminology, im sure that will be helpful the next time there's a discussion between her and the ex. My first post actually did give OP some advice and wasn't just about the term babysitting