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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Make me smile... things people say to you during a breakup

50 replies

Anotherbrokenheart · 02/01/2017 11:25

So I'm 4 days into my partner telling me it was over. We lived together, built our lives together and I thought we would get married. Now I'm back at my parents figuring out how the hell I got here.

But anyway I need to smile so wondered what other people have been told after a breakup.

Some of my favourite so far have been

Oh you were way out of this league (thanks and he still doesn't want me!)

Things happen for a reason. Well no probably not but thanks.

What else have people had?

OP posts:

NoMoreCricketDartsOrFootball · 03/01/2017 21:34

RedMapleLeaf and AnotherBrokenHeart - it seems some blokes have a radar for freshly broken up women.

The day after an unceremonious dumping I had a message out of the blue from a "sort of" ex, with a transparent agenda. On telling him what had just happened, he wrote "Well when the shop re-opens give me a yell"

Original poster

Anotherbrokenheart · 04/01/2017 10:22

Today I've been told I need to stop feeling sorry for myself!

OP posts:

skyyequake · 04/01/2017 10:29

When I finally kicked out my abusive arse of an ex my dad said "oh it's a shame you two couldn't make it work"

Ineedmorelemonpledge · 04/01/2017 12:33

"Let me know if you want me to put one in you.."

Supposed mutual friend.

Tempting...

GeekLove · 04/01/2017 15:59

Following me dumping my 6th form boyfriend after 6 weeks of agonizing about it (6 weeks too long to be honest)

"You should get back with him 'cause you were good for him"

Thus cementing my suspicion in my hometown that I wasn't a real person more a social service for inadequate males (particularly those who thought basic self-care was a frivolous waste of time).

Hobbitwife001 · 04/01/2017 18:14

People just don't know what to say or how to react unless they've been through a bad breakup or divorce, I've had some crackers said to me after my 27 year marriage ended due to my ex being a lying, cheating scumbag.
"He'll regret it, but this week's news is next week's fish and chip paper isn't it? " huh? I'm glad you think I'll be over his massive betrayal so quickly, by next week I'll be fine and dandy I'm sure..

"The best way to get over a man is to get under another one" Ffs, that one was my cousin, hastily followed by, "but wait until you're ready obviously"

"I'm sorry you're so upset, but he should still keep in touch with his friends shouldn't he?" Thanks a bunch for your support, I'll cross you off my Christmas card list..

I'm sorry OP, it will take as long as you need it to, hand hold and shoulder squeeze on its way to you, xx

FriendofBill · 04/01/2017 18:21

Next!

(Lerarned this from MN)

LadyTrevelyan · 04/01/2017 18:43

to all and to my new dear friend NoMoreCricketDartsOrFootball

georgethecat · 04/01/2017 21:56

^^ bleary eyed and thought the above said no more farts.....which is equally true

chocdonutyy · 04/01/2017 22:00

My lovely nan told me she never really liked him anyway. Could have mentioned it earlier though!

NoMoreCricketDartsOrFootball · 05/01/2017 01:42

Hahaha georgethecat yes!!!!! Although my dog more than makes up for it in that department.

LadyTrevelyan I'm only 5 days into my break up and your short post actually helped more than you can imagine . I'm in Australia and said football watching involved said ex turning the tv on on the middle of the night due to the time difference, ugh.

QueenMortifauxcado · 05/01/2017 02:04

A particularly nasty ex tried to revenge porn me on Facebook. The page was full of his mates asking for my phone number

cx5221 · 05/01/2017 02:08

My best friend after I got horribly dumped by ex 'I always thought his eyes were too close together!' WTAF?

'We thought you were going through some sort of breakdown when you said you were dating him' My ex boss me and ex dp worked together

'I'm so glad you've split up I can slag him off again now without worrying about offending you'

As you can tell he was quite a catch

Tenshidarkangel · 05/01/2017 10:34

"You escaped Satan" -About my Ex's mother.
They were right. She was and still is from what I hear.

debbs77 · 05/01/2017 18:04

"Maybe I could end up having an affair with you and cheat on her one day" (ex husband said this to me after he left me for the other woman)

skyyequake · 05/01/2017 20:30

debbs that is the most entitled, remorseless, conceited utter bollocks I have ever heard! I want to punch your ex just based on that sentence alone!!

Angleshades · 05/01/2017 20:42

Cx5221 lol did we date the same guy? My dsis said exactly the same about a guy I dated this summer, his eyes were too close together thinking about it. He was a total twat too and I think I was definitely having some sort of break down by dating him

NotTheFordType · 05/01/2017 20:50

"You should have a good cry"
"You probably need to let it all out in tears"
"Crying does you good"
"You've never really cried over him, I think you should do"

All from my mum, over the same breakup, when I was 40. I'm not the crying type, more the lie-awake-at-night-with-clenched-fists-dreaming-of-vengeance type.

It's like she was some kind of lachrymal vampire.

Lifeisabloodysoap · 05/01/2017 22:06

When my ex left he said "I really hope one day we can go play pool as friends"

One year on he hasn't seen either of his kids idiot!

NoMoreCricketDartsOrFootball · 06/01/2017 06:40

Omg NotTheFordType, now I want another username based on your post- LachrymalVampire. That is brilliant Always great to know your parents understand you, isn't it

debbs77 seriously?!? Wow, you were well rid. Some men are such entitled tossers.

user1477282676 · 06/01/2017 06:42

"You'll be over him in two weeks"

This said by my older sister after my terribly dysfunctional relationship ended and I was utterly DEVASTATED and broken.

She was right.

He was a complete wanker...awful! I couldn't see it immediately though.

Heartbroken47 · 06/01/2017 13:42

My dear Mum loved to tell us
"There's plenty more fish in the sea"
Or
"Another bus will come along in 10 mins"
My sister and I have taken the mantle of saying this to each other since she passed away :-)

EverythingEverywhere1234 · 06/01/2017 14:20

A fun one was when I told a girl I work with that I'd broken up with my DP of 2.5 years, lived together etc... 'OH. I thought he was single at the Summer Ball!' (4 months before we broke up). She looked horrified. That was awkward.

Apart from that tho, it was from my mum; 'Well that nose was taking over every photo. Besides that, birth is hard enough without any babies inheriting his hooter!' Delightful. Well done Ma.

HelsBels5000 · 06/01/2017 14:27

After telling my parents of my break up with husband of a year (together 7yrs) - my DM came out with 'oh well we knew he wasn't right for you all along'
Er gee thanks, could you not have told me that at any point in the previous 6 years before we got married and then realised it was doomed?

debbs77 · 06/01/2017 14:51

HelsBels, my grandfather told me they expected us to only last 7 years (we managed 12).

My mum also told me about walking in on my ex and a girl we lived with and them both jumping up and doing up their trousers. We were only in our first year then! They never told me!

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