All first dates no second dates, and men texting after a date but not asking you out!

[TwoCirclesthatdontoverlap]

Looking for any feedback that goes beyond love yourself, get a life etc because obviously I have all of that covered. My self-esteem is fine & I walk away from men who aren't going to meet my needs. But that leaves me with a never-ending list of first dates.
I know I have done more than 50% of the rejecting so I can't really cry in to my mashed potato for one (yet) but the last four internet dates I've been on, three of the four have rejected a second date with me. The last one, we were really vibing on our date (although perhaps I couldn't exactly read the vibe) and it was easy and fun. We had a good on line rapport which ground to a halt the moment I got out of the taxi and put my key in the door. By the next day (I'm not a slow learner) I had deciphered through reverberating silence that seemed to deafen the internet that we weren't going to have a second date. Fine, Ok, I accepted that. But then he started texting me, but really boring texts, like he was deliberately working hard at being quite boring. If there was one thing he wasn't it was boring so again I had to deduce that he was trying to communicate through the medium of being really boring that we weren't a thing. I got that. Every time I put him to the back of my mind I got another text from him to remind me. I got two texts in a row (i'd ignored one) so it was like he was determined to remind me. I asked are we actually going to meet up? And he has disappeared.

Anyway, for the sake of clarification, I'm not using photos that are decades old (less than a year all of them), they're not photo shopped. I am not overweight. And yes I do have kids, but not tiny ones, and they all knew that before they met me (and the most recent one also had kids, older kids but he did have kids).

Ps, I'm not being really fussy with the ones I've rejected. I tend to reject men if there are awkward silences, misunderstandings, no humour, and they want to meet again

So, that's where the name change comes from, there is just no over lap between the men who'd date me and the men I'd date.

Gonna keep trying etc but I was wondering if anybody had any tips for bringing these two circles closer together. Give me a venn diagram that overlaps slightly please universe!

[TwoCirclesthatdontoverlap]

Well, Yeh, I meant to put most of them. After I pressed submit I thought, damn, left out the most. But I do think that man came across as being too like a girlfriend to me anyway.

[Trills]

It's very sensible to say that you liked a man but there was something in his behaviour or attitudes or speech or body language that you just didn't fancy, even if you can't pinpoint what it is.

I agree that you should listen to your instincts on these things - if you just don't fancy him then that's OK, you're not obliged to fancy anyone even if they are nice and interesting.

No need for anyone to talk about how "all men" are one way and "all women" are another way - talking like that would just make me switch off and assume the speaker was wrong about everything else they spoke about as well.

[Trills]

x-posted there

I expect you look for different things in a friend to in a partner.

You don't need to be able to list the criteria to be able to say that a person ticks the friend boxes but not the partner boxes.
(presumably the boxes overlap so you will have "nice" and "interesting" in both lists)

[TwoCirclesthatdontoverlap]

Yeh that was racing to press post!