Hi.
I don't want to be trolled or insulted this is a real and legitimate question. I'm 41 and for about two years now I have been getting more and more bored with sex and the idea of sex. I last had it about nine months ago when DP was pregnant with new and final DS. (See how I'm getting the hang on abbreviations).
I'm a Decorator and quite simply cannot afford a 5th child. I work hard to provide and would rather put my energy into that.
DP couldn't understand why I wanted it done as she had the coil fitted but my body, my decision we decided.
Now DP isn't really into sex all that much. She never really has been, some women arn't We had it maybe twice a week when we were first together but it just petered out over time she can take it or leave it mostly leave it which suits me.
We've been together eight years and have 2 DC together. We're content enough, used to each other and function perfectly well together raising the children.
I also have two DC with ex-wife who I believe was a nymphomaniac. We were at it like rabbits for four years in every way imaginable our chemistry was electric. I think I got rid of a lifetimes sexual desire with her in four years. Trouble is her pattern, I discovered, is she only keeps her men for four years then moves onto the next one. After which she is just pure evil to the previous husband or partner.
I swore she was the last broken heart I would ever have though losing my kids or my Dad would be another one.
Everything is functional down there, blood flows.
It still gets up before me in the morning but I just can't be bothered anymore.
Sex is just a chore these days not a pleasure. I don't masturbate anymore because it just isn't worth the effort. The last time I got any pleasure out of sex was 2 years ago but I forget the circumstances, pretty sure we were just filling a biological need though.
I've tried to speak to my male friends about this and their ridiculous advice ranges from visiting a prostitute, watching loads of porn, taking Viagra though there's no need and trading DP in for a younger thinner model. Even our friends the gay couple said something along the same lines when I asked them which was surprising.
My desire to go sticking bits of myself into another person has gone. I've done it. I've got over it and I don't see the point in it any more.
I'd rather have a pint or read a book. DP doesn't want it or need it. I don't need it so why should there be a problem.
Am I looking for one where there isn't one?
It surely cannot be wrong to be fed up with sex at my time of life I've been having it since I was 20 and it just totally bores the pants onto me now.
. I'd rather we read a book together. What do you think. I think there are more important things to be worrying about like work and paying rentanbills.