Loving yourself

[pinkpixie83]

How do you do it?

I've had a rough time recently, and feel like I've probably bought most of it on myself. I tend to blame everything on myself, so I figure to change I need to learn to love myself. I'm just not sure how to do that?

Now there's a question I've tackled this year myself.

I've spent years blaming and punishing myself for something in my past. This year I've made a lot of effort to change this because I've finally felt like I've paid enough and actually wanted to.

So the start for me was letting go of what went before and focussing on the present and future. I can't change the past, I can be the sort of person I admire in others, so that's what I've tried to be. I take as many opportunities as I can to give, whether that's just a smile or something more substantial.

In addition, I've tempered that with balancing it by giving kindness to myself. It's too easy to get lost in people pleading and lose your sense of self in the process when you inevitably meet people who are just intent on taking.

Louise Hay has a lot of good material on this. We can start by saying I love you to ourselves whenever we are in the mirror. (Also, I approve of you is another good one).

Also, trying to catch and rephrase any negative and critical self talk. "I'm so stupid, I always do this" can turn into "Hey, I'm doing my best, everyone makes mistakes sometimes".

Being kinder to ourselves in our thoughts and deeds. Like we would any friend or loved one. Making sure we eat well, sleep well, bathe, do things that we enjoy. Basically loving ourselves like we love others.

Since I realized how to do the tangible steps, like taking time for a hot bath each night. Making sure I eat right. Not hurting myself by drinking too much or putting up with bad treatment etc... I can rest easy that I am doing the best I can to love myself. It's practice and I'm not fully there yet myself but for sure but we can do it.