The Ol' communication debacle.

[tohaveandhavenot]

My husband is depressed - that in itself is hard to deal with.

Talking to him about anything serious (money, jobs, even politics) is just such hard work. I always leave most serious conversations feeling like oh that's right we probably shouldn't be together.

The rest of the time 70% we are fine, we laugh a lot together, he is loyal great with the kids and I find him extremely attractive.

Any thoughts? I'm not quite sure what I am asking except for maybe similar situations?

I suppose talk about them as little as possible, and focus on the areas you can connect. The 70%, if you see what I mean. Being partner of someone with depression is tough. I sometimes think half the women I know on ADs are people whose husbands should be on ADs, not them.

The depression is so hard to deal with. I feel like I am walking on egg shells half the time.

And yes he won't bloody go well go to the doctor

Classic! I think I'd be inclined to give him a deadline. Explain it impacts you, he isn't thinking clearly, and needs more help than you can offer on your own, so he must go to doctor. Tell him you will take him and go in with him if it helps. Book the appointment. Don't get emotional when you tell him about it, don't use an anxious or loud voice. Just be casual, so his protective defences don't ramp up.