A friend I went to uni with has always been extremely generous - along with her mother who always looked after me, helping out when my own parents weren't there for me, etc. The family is middle class so it's not like they can throw money left, I think friend and mum just like spending big! For all those years after I left uni they keep sending lots and lots expensive clothes and other gifts - now mainly for my daughter but myself as well. I have tried to ask nicely (several times) that they don't bother at all or just send a few small gifts, however, they always go above and beyond. I have always returned the favour but on a much smaller scale as I am quite frugal and don't like spending hundreds and hundreds of pounds on gifts (I think an item like a good book, nice scarf, or a silver necklace is sufficient). This year I told her that I've bought them a few things and sent through their country's Amazon as international charges are steep and also suggested that she could do the same for us to avoid the hassle of posting and wasting her money. Her response was "Great, I am heading to the post office now to send the packages", not even acknowledging what I'd said. I know it's their choice to give so much but I do feel guilty, particularly because this friend and I have lost touch throughout the years. Nowadays we message each other quite rarely and speak on face time even less often (probably my fault for avoiding actual calls as conversations always tend to go over an hour long, with her answering my questions but seldom asking me anything personal). When I text her (she doesn't really initiate) her responses are quite short without much room for continuing the conversation. I feel like our friendship has come down to infrequent, superficial texts and gift exchanges for birthdays and Christmas which (from my point of view) serve no purpose other than put pressure to return the gesture. And I am baffled that although the friendship has deteriorated she still insists on sending so much stuff. Not even sure how to tell her that we would really rather not receive gifts any more (or at best, token/small gifts for daughter only if she so wants to send). How do I phrase this in a way that doesn't come across as insulting or ungrateful?