Parenting advice very much needed....

[CakeLover0]

Love mumsnet for helping me at my toughest times. So grateful for this site. Being a single parent is hard so really appreciate it.
Just wondering what time your DC's go to bed?
My 2 youngest are 11 and 9.
11 year old is very emotional but showers and gets up when asked. Chats to friends etc. My 9 year old is a diva. A moany pants. Will not sleep in her own bed but we are on to that. Just wondering when you all send them on their merry way to bed. I don't have any me time as I'm normally shattered by 9. Trying to stay down longer though because I am slowly going bonkers!

At 9 years, I think it was lights out at 8.00pm. He's 12 now, and it's more like 9.00pm.

Mine go about 8.30. They are 6 and 8.

Many people I know send their kids upstairs earlier but they're not expecting them to sleep, just to play quietly.

Thankyou.
It was 9 and they would be up on devices until gone 10 sometimes. I have tried 7.30 then lights out at 9. My 9 year old will still be moaning at 11pm.
What about the weekend?

9 yrs old DD goes anywhere between 7-8pm on school nights, although sometimes not asleep til after 9.
Weekends the same sometimes 8.30-9.
Early but she's a pita otherwise.

I meant 8.30 not 7.30. We don't eat until 7 sometimes 🙈
Thanks. I feel guilty sometimes as by the time I come in from work and cook and clean up its almost 8pm. I just feel quite exhausted and need me time too. Just feel guilty.

My 8 year old is asleep by 8 usually and 11 year old about 8.30 but they are early risers and pretty much ready to sleep by then. I don't allow any devices after they have had tea at about 5.30

It's hard as a single parent as you need your down time.

Mine are 4 - currently goes to bed by 7.30 at the latest but he's up by 6am!

6 - I try and get him to bed by 7.45 but it's normally closer to 8pm and he is still normally shouting at me till at least 8.30

8 - bed at 8pm but can read till 8.15 can be awake still singing in bed at 9.30 some nights and quite often questions me if I dare to go to bed early.

I don't go to bed much later than 10pm ever as I'm always tired it's only going to get harder. I wish I had a second lounge so I could at least watch something different to them!

It is hard isn't it?!
My days off feel more chilled like today. As I sit here watching some American rubbish but it keeps them happy.
I'm usually exhausted by 9. They actually question if I'm not in bed by 9.

Single parent here too. She's 7. She is allowed her iPad for a little time after dinner then it's bath and reading. Bedtime is between 7.30 and 8pm. You so need your down time. Even if it's pottering/washing/working

9pm nowadays. They're 8 and 6.

Maybe I need to stay awake longer to get my me time

I wish I could stay awake longer to get down time

Haha! I'm going for 10 pm tonight.
Alot of it is boredom. If I had some much needed adult company I might stay awake a little longer.....

I find that too, don't feel quite as lonely if I'm in bed and I tend to put the tv on and fall asleep curled up with the cat!

I will admit to taking the 6 year old to bed with me the other night as I was so fed up of sleeping alone.

Aww bless you. It can get lonely. Bed feels less lonely

Mine are 9 and 11 and they turn off at 10. I'm asleep before that.

Mine are very annoying. 14yo goes at 10 but THEN faffs about for half hour and usually I am already in bed.
12yo has to be nagged and nagged from 9 onwards. So usually ends up in and down by 10

I get no time to myself

Mine both DDs age 12 and 9. Youngest goes up around 8 ish and read then usually around 8:30 when I leave. 12 is a nightmare has always liked sleeping in my bed whenever possible and goes up around 9 but usually anywhere between 10-11 before she is asleep. I need down time on my own so stay up and this means I'm usually shattered because of it - bit of a cycle I guess.

Bedtime routine starts at 06:30pm in this house, as I have an Aspie,she needs her routine. I don't bath the kids every night, but we turn off the TV , tablets gadgets etc and group to our rooms. I know I am a bit odd with this but I find it easier to discipline them if I'm also upstairs. So we all brush teeth together and wash. The girls end organise clothes for tomorrow, get anything out of bags and into nightwear, they then find a book and read or do some drawing activity. They are 8 & 10. DS(6) has a bit more involved as he has eczema, so after the wash /teeth ritual I apply his cream and read his bedtime story. I then put out his light and go. I do not allow any lights, as they just show all the fun things to do in his room, we have no monsters here. The girls no longer want a bedtime story from mum 😭 so its big light off and nightlight and music on. I use c!assical or chill out music without lyrics. This is where the trouble starts. DD2 is tired and wants to sleep, but DD1 the Aspie only sleeps 6 hrs per night. They have to share a room as DS and the girls fight. So DD1 whispering to her half deaf sister makes her giggle and get told off,DD1 seems to think I don't know she's setting DD2 off. This will be about 7pm maybe half past. There will be me trying to read or on my tablet for the next three to four hours, counting to three and taking all number of things away, until exhausted and having lost far too many things DD2 succumbs to tiredness and crashes. DD1 Falls asleep approximately 1am. I used to think I ought to also beawake while she was, now shes older and I am on my own and it nearly kiilling me,I now also crash with DD2 abt 9/10pm

Damn sorry that was long! I also NEVER change this, if its holidays or weekends I keep to it. Even though its not really great,its even worse if I let DS stay up later just because its not a school night. No reason why just because its holidays or weekend they should get to stay up later. Besides this is my time.

Wow, just realised how lucky we are!

All 4 kids go to bed at their bedtime and we never hear a peep out of them!

3yo (nearly 4) 7pm
6yo 7.30pm school nights, 8pm other nights
10yo 8pm school nights, 8.30pm other nights
12yo (nearly 13) supposed to be 9pm but often goes earlier then wakes up at silly o clock!

Due to this thread I sent them off at 9.30 but am too tired to enjoy it

Mine are 8 and 10. They start heading off to bed about 7.30pm-8pm, toilet and teeth, snuggle and a chapter of a book (a David Walliams or Harry Potter or similar), then into their own beds by about 8.30pm. They're allowed to read for an hour or so, but they usually don't last that long. My 8 year old wakes up at 5-6am every morning regardless of the time he goes to bed so needs to get to sleep at a reasonable hour.