My DH tells lies about ridiculously small things. Should I be worried about this? He tells me what sounds good or what will make me happy/keep the peace. There are no big lies, only little ones. It has affected my trust because I now question and look for evidence of lies. I worry that he is telling me lies a lot, even though there is no evidence of that. I think he gets it off his mother, who does the same, and who recently encouraged our DD to lie (e.g. don't tell your Mum you had those sweets).
BTW I am not a scary person who he can't tell the truth to. I hate lies and he knows lying is always worse than just being honest with me.
This is how ridiculous it is:
One evening when our DS had the sickness bug, he washed his hands after changing a nappy and I noticed he did not use and soap and only swilled his hands quickly. I said: "please can you make sure you are washing your hands properly and with soap as the bug is very contagious"...etc. He replied: "I did use soap".
We then had a massive debate about whether or not he used soap (because I KNEW he didn't). I even smelled his hands, because the soap has a distinctive smell, to prove it. It took him A WHOLE YEAR to admit to me that he did not use the soap that day.
Another time whilst out in town, I saw his car approaching from a direction it would not have come from that day had he been working in the location he told me. So I asked "What time did you get back from x today?". He replied he'd come straight home from that location. I told him I saw him an hour ago driving from the opposite direction. He said he'd taken a wrong turn at an island and had then got a phone call from his manager, so drove to ASDA car park to take the call, where he sat on the car park for an hour. So I checked his phone and he hadn't been talking to his manager, but to a girl in the marketing department. He then admitted he was talking to her and explained what about (work-related).
I believe there is nothing between him and this girl. I believe he told me the easiest story he could think of. But it still involved several lies.
When I first met him we had a conversation where I told him the idea of having debts scared me and I would not want to get serious with someone who had debts. He told me he had no debts, even though he did. He later explained he felt embarrassed about the debt. I know this is a bigger lie. I understood his reasoning and he paid the debt off anyway a year or so later.
Frustrated with this and sometimes I worry whether I actually know this man. There is nothing else about him that I have issues with though. He is lovely, kind and considerate in general.