TTC, but relieved I'm not pregnant. Why?

[PollyCazaletWannabe]

DH and I are currently TTC (since October, so not long). My period didn't arrive at the weekend so I took a pg test this morning (not in UK so it's Monday morning here). It came up as negative. Last month I was disappointed not to be pregnant but this month I feel relieved why? Is this normal?

You really didn't want to miss out on pate at Xmas?
When we were TTC my second and my period was late, I was absolutely terrified. Bawled my eyes out at the positive test and didn't tell my OH for two days until I'd got my head around it first. I think TTC is so stressful, your emotions are just all over the place!

No, not normal. Disappointed not relieved would be normal if you are genuinely trying.

So, can you articulate what's going on in your head?

We were TTC but had said that if it happened we'd be happy. When I got my positive I was hysterical, terrified and I kept thinking, "what have I done?!"

That lasted about 20 minutes and then I was fine

Even when you want it, pregnancy and having a baby are a big, scary deal.

OK I may have spoken too soon.. Now that the initial reaction has worn off I feel disappointed and am wondering how soon would be too soon to take another test! Maybe it's normal to have varying reactions, at least it seems like it from the responses! Thanks all