Cheater?

[NeighnotI]

Yesterday I went on to a social media account I don't often use and there was a message saying my DP was cheating on me. Message is from what looks like a dummy profile set up solely to send that message. It was sent several weeks ago.

Confronted DP, he denied it of course. Gave me his phone, no evidence of anything. Google location tracker shows him being where he says is his on nights he's not with me. We are together 6 nights a week so I can't see how he'd find the time to cheat.

Also, why would he? We're not married, don't live together, no kids. He could walk away easily if he wanted to be with someone else.

He hasn't reacted much, says he loves me etc and said what more can he do other than say it isn't true.

I don't know what to think. My head is spinning. I have no proof of cheating and I can't see why he'd bother. Do I let an anonymous message ruin my relationship?

That message isn't really evidence. I would reply asking for details, otherwise how do you verify it.

Please don't assume because you're not married or living together a person would not cheat. Of course they could walk away, but the cheaters love the pleasure of 2 men or women at their disposal, stroking their ego.

I have replied asking for more info. There are a couple of people I could see doing this out of spite but who knows.

TBH - if you've had no reason to suspect - then my response to your message would be - 'who the hell are you? and that you'd want some details and proof!
Without it there isn't much you can do is there?
The truth is that anyone can be deceived or betrayed. But you can't live life with constant suspicion. I hope you find out more about who and why, or alternatively some evidence to back up the allegation. Until then it may as well be me telling you he's having an affair - or mystic meg, or the tarot cards! Try to not let it affect your behaviour x

Sandy is right, anyone can cheat. He could have a secret phone or use a hidden app. I've heard of men who delete apps as they arrive home and reinstall them when they leave.
However it may be nothing to worry about. Ask the sender for more info. I hope you get answers.

Well shit.

He's been chatting to men on Grindr. He's bisexual so this isn't a shock. Denied it until I showed him the screenshots. He has been lying to me all week. Says it is only chatting, likes the attention. He's sorry, he never did any more than chat. He loves me, wants to have a life with me. Isn't that part 1 of the script?

Shit you poor thing,what a shock.
Tbh I have a number of gay friends who use grindr and not once have one of them just used it for chatting. They literally talk to one man for an hour tops and then meet up for sex.
I wouldn't believe him about just chatting at all.

No they don't just chat on Grinder, in fact I don't think anyone does, it's pretty hard core sex pics and sex meet ups.

Why chat on Grindr? As others have said that is really for hook-ups. Maybe sexting? If you have Google tracker info then you can see where he has been and the times and if he isnt going out of normal routes/times then perhaps it is just chatting/sexting.

Either way, he doesnt seem to be wholly committed to you.

Did you find out who'd sent the message, OP? They did you a favour, really.

I've never heard of Grindr used for just chatting. But even if that were the case, surely he had a good opportunity to own up when you confronted him about the message.

I'd definitely recommend a checkup for STDs, and probably leaving him, but if not, then having some serious discussions and counselling.

Sorry you're going through this.

I'm glad you have your own house, OP, and don't live with this man.