What would you think?

[Maryannesingleton]

If you found out that your dh had set up a business with a woman you had never met? Stbxh and I are in the progress of divorce, he completely shut me out in the year before I left and I couldn't work out why. Now I have his declaration and I see that he was made redundant and set up a company with this woman, who I think he used to work with. I knew none of this, and am shocked that he didn't share anything with me. He was working away in the week as he has always done. His form says that he does not intend to live with anyone, but I don't know how much to question this relationship and partnership as obviously now he is self employed he earns virtually nothing...

Interesting stuff about narcissists and projection.

Mary, he will blame you for everything and unfortunately, you may take all that guilt on board for some time to come. You just need to even it out with a lot of kind, gentle, loving thoughts for yourself. It does take two to make/break a relationship. The blame should never rest solely with one person. However, when one person is quite clearly at fault and passing the buck then you need to really take stock of the past and present.

I've thought long and hard (perhaps too hard) about my ex and that relationship and it has fuelled me, not only to understand who I really am, but to be a better person. You will get there too. A cliche but time does heal. So continue to get out there, have dinner with friends, laugh, love, be you.

Thanks, that's a positive thought to hold on to x