I have a relationship problem in two words

[SleepingTiger]

Is it 'ass' or 'arse'?

As in "the bastard has been wearing my Laboutin's down the pub again. I shall kick his sorry xxxxxx when he gets home"

I see ass used by many, but isn't that what appears on Christmas cards?

Who do I believe?

An ass is the American version of a British arse.

No donkey kicking involved.

If you mean ass/arse as in 'Kick his sorry...', then 'ass' is correct, because this is an American expression and the American word is therefore appropriate.

In any other context you should use 'arse', 'I will kick his arse from here into next week'.

I hope that helps.

Arse if you're in the Uk

Arse in uk.

Technically it's 'arse' in Uk but I hate the way it looks for some reason so I use 'ass'.

ARSE! (FECK, DRINK, etc)

It inexplicably annoys me when people say "arse" when it's written "ass" though. "Oh look, the movie "Kick-Arse" is on TV". NO.

Also, no apostrophe required in Laboutins.

As you seem so keen to get it right

Arse, ass is far too American for me to say. Combined with a very northeast accent it sounds ridiculous

Also also it's Louboutins

Ok, I think I am kind of getting it. So if I was a US citizen and I actually did want to kick a donkey, how would I be able to convey that appropriately?

US words are confusing I think. I remember getting on a plane once there, and the air hostess asked if I wanted an alcoholic drink. I declined the alcohol and said I would love some TWA tea. Got thrown off on the tarmac.

Also thanks for the help on the apostrophe thingy. I don't have any of those shoes by the way. I was just using it as an example. I don't know why I find syntax so hard.

I remember once getting on a US airline, sometim

As SmashingInAthleticWear said. And it's arse.

You'd say you wanted to kick a donkey. What's TWA tea?

SleepingTiger, I think the American for 'donkey' is 'donkey'. So you would say 'I want to kick a donkey'.

Sorry to hear about your experience with the American airline. They can be a bit prim and prefer to use euphemisms like 'bathroom' rather than 'loo' or 'toilet' which they consider to be indelicate. It is easy to see how your TWA tea was 'misinterpreted'...

So if I was a US citizen and I actually did want to kick a donkey, how would I be able to convey that appropriately?

I want to kick a donkey.

Not sure why you would though, but I guess your question is rhetorical.

Leave the donkey alone!

I'm so confused! How is bathroom a euphemism? It's just another name for a toilet surely? Also what is TWA tea? what did they yake offence to? And did you really get kicked off the flight?

As if the donkeys haven't suffered enough.

Just looked up the TWA tea joke. It's not hilarious.

WILL SOMEBODY THINK OF THE DONKEYS!

ARSE

Wings - In GB a bathroom is a room with a bath. In America a bathroom - or rest room as they sometimes call it - does not usually have a bath, particularly the ones in public places, neither are you likely to want to rest in one. They use these terms to avoid saying words they regard as impolite, such as loo, lavatory or toilet. In other words they are euphemisms.

The TWA tea joke was mildly amusing and better than some I have seen on Mumsnet recently.

Do not worry Restless, rest assured the RSPCA have been alerted and are looking out for the donkeys.

Oh! Funny, I've spent 30 years calling it a bathroom and no one has batted an eyelid. Or maybe they have and I've just never noticed. I jut can't seperate the two in my head. They are the same to me. Imagine if we had a diffrent name for sitting rooms that contained a tv and didn't contain a tv? madness!

Arse.

Imagine if we had a diffrent name for sitting rooms that contained a tv and didn't contain a tv? madness!

If your prime reason for going into the room is to use the TV...?

...but would a sitting room still be a sitting room if there was nowhere to sit? If your primary objective is to sit the presence or otherwise of a television would be irrelevant.

On the other hand, if you specifically wanted to watch television, you should make enquiries as to whether the sitting room has a television as well as somewhere to sit in order to avoid missing your favourite show.