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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Husband joked I was thick

51 replies

mum19821985 · 29/11/2016 15:50

Husband, mil and I just went shopping. While in a large supermarket I picked up bread to go in the trolley. I said that it was nice and thick. He said "a bit like you then!" I hit him with the bread but laughed it off. He then ran off to tell his mum what he said. She and also a lady in a wheel chair also laughed. I told husband that it was a good job he was hiding behind his mum otherwise I would let him have it! We carried on shopping and I forgot all about it. However in the car mil started laughing saying that my husband made that woman's day when he said I was like the bread (thick). They both laughed. I am now very cross with husband that he would say that in public and that him and his mother find it so funny. She is always fawning over him saying how intelligent he is too. Grrrrr. Had to rant. Am I being over sensitive? Hubby doesn't know why I am cross.

OP posts:
PuppyMonkey · 29/11/2016 16:44

Good grief, it's an ancient joke that's probably been done 50 million times before - are you really so shocked and offended by it? Confused

OohhThatsMe · 29/11/2016 16:45

He doesn't sound clever and nor does she. He might be able to pass exams, if that's what she's referring to, but he doesn't sound very bright.

DearMrDilkington · 29/11/2016 16:48

He ran off to tell his mum?! The joke wasn't even very funny. How strangeGrin

mum19821985 · 29/11/2016 16:50

It's not so much the joke itself. It's more the fact that he and his mum were laughing. Tbh the issue is more about him and his mother.

OP posts:
Manumission · 29/11/2016 16:52

Don't go to the supermarket with your BF and his mum.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/11/2016 16:52

You presumably knew he was close to his mother though?

Are you both quite young? Genuine question.

I know he ran off to tell his mum but if you are going to 'banter' and piss about in a supermarket to the extent of involving other people then you are going to look ridiculous.

Manumission · 29/11/2016 16:54

I didn't hit him round the head lol. Just in in the side. Not hard. We mess around like that all the time.

Actually, TBF, you all sound as bad as each other. Hopefully two of you at least have the excuse of being under 21.

PuppyMonkey · 29/11/2016 16:55

But I would just look at them in a Hmm way and move on with my life. the random woman probably just went home and told her DH she saw a couple of really odd people in Tesco's who were acting vrry strange so she just smiled at them and made her escape. Grin

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/11/2016 16:56

Puppy Me too Grin

P1nkP0ppy · 29/11/2016 16:57

Pathetic little boy.
Just say 'It takes one to recognise another' and walk away. Find yourself a man who's not a mummy's boy.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 29/11/2016 16:58

Not sure P1nk's suggested response is any more mature than the original comment!

HeadDreamer · 29/11/2016 16:58

What I can't get over is him running over to his mum. Are you both very young? I wouldn't have a problem with this because I know I'm very smart. (I have a PhD). And nothing anyone says in that area can hurt me. However, if someone digs at my looks like this, I'll be furious.

Similarly I see this isn't the first time he puts you down intellectually. It's not acceptable. You are insecure in this area, and he should be sensitive about it.

HeadDreamer · 29/11/2016 16:59

I wouldn't say he's his mummy's boy in his face, precisely because he's actually one! I'll say it to my husband to tease him because he knows he's not one. If you see what I mean?

zippey · 29/11/2016 17:08

Being able to laugh at yourself is a good quality.

But it depends on your relationship and if he puts you down a lot.

I think the joke can be funny in the right context

citybumpkin · 29/11/2016 17:14

Banter between the two of you is fine - if it is mutual thing but to involve others who back the "abuser" up then...really not on. My ex did this. In fact I only realised recently when deleting some facebook history that he did it several times on there. His mother did it too and he always sided with her. And he was the one who accused me of belittling him? Arghhh.

Simonneilsbeard · 29/11/2016 17:14

Him and his mother sound like a couple of bellends tbh

RedMapleLeaf · 29/11/2016 17:15

Would it be helpful to tell us a bit more about your husband's relationship with his mother?

HeadDreamer · 29/11/2016 17:22

I'm not sure if he's constantly putting the OP down is actually banter. If the OP feels sensitive about it, then it's bullying isn't it?

Allovertheworld16 · 29/11/2016 17:45

It depends doesn't it? On the face of it it's a joke and you hit him with the bread, move on. But if his mother is still laughing about it in the car later then I can understand you not being impressed.

Mind you I am very sensitive these days after putting up with exh's jokes digs at my expense and laughing through gritted teeth for years. I can't put up with it these days.

SeaCabbage · 29/11/2016 17:57

I don't think his mum likes you.

He should stick up for you, not collude.

DustyMaiden · 29/11/2016 23:58

I was shopping with my sister today and said I saw a loaf with my name on but hers was the thick one. I hope she didn't take it seriously.

Husband joked I was thick
Manumission · 30/11/2016 00:01

He didn't collude cabbage - he started it. The MIL was colluding with him.

But they were all mucking about anyway.

forumdonkey · 30/11/2016 00:07

Just point him to the party sausages. I bet the woman would have laughed harder

Patriciathestripper1 · 30/11/2016 00:07

ceramic
Hahaha I'd def go with that one op!!Grin

CockacidalManiac · 30/11/2016 00:24

The long winter evenings must just fly by in your house. You're in a relationship with Colin Hunt from the Fast Show.