Some men, and women too, are emotionally clueless but saying 'you're ok' and 'it's ok' suggests that he is at least trying to give you some reassurance that it will be ok.
Of course that's not what you want to hear when what you really want to do is weep and wail and tear your hair at the unspeakable unfairness of it all, but when we have young dc to care for we can't give way to our more primitive emotions when it suits us and we can't always cry to order when they're fast asleep or at nursery/school etc.
Time doesn't heal, but it does enable us to reach some accomodation with grief where it becomes less raw, and we eventually move into a new normal where our departed loved ones become such an intrinsic part of us that we can derive as much pleasure from our memories of them as the incalculable sadness we feel when measuring our loss.
You may be floundering, but you're not lost, OP. If your dm was your lodestar, she always will be and she'll make sure you find your way out of whatever mazes you encounter in life.
Get some quality sleep tonight and try not to overthink what may be going on at home, or what you may be going back to. Let thoughts come to you and reject any that have no resonance for you or no place in this precious 'time out' that you have managed to carve for yourself.
If you feel up to it, reach out to GriefLine this evening and start to offload some of your conflicted thoughts and feelings. Chatting to someone who truly understands for even 5 minutes can take a huge load off and you may find that it opens the floodgates and gives you some much needed clarity.
Above all, be kind to yourself OP and try to let some of that kindness extend to your h who may be 'floundering' even more than you are.
I hope you'll be back with an update tomorrow or sooner. 
Sweet dreams x