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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How do you recover from broken trust

5 replies

ems137 · 18/11/2016 16:56

I was just wondering if anyone had any tips and suggestions for me please?

My DH was found out to be on dating sites 2 years ago while I was pregnant with our now 14 month old. Our after school club leader approached me in the playground and told me. I'd never even heard of this particular app/site and I'd had no suspicions of anything untoward. We were still having sex most days and were generally happy, I mean we were expecting a baby FFS!

Since then I've tried so hard to not be a paranoid wreck, I've not snooped through phone/iPad etc but every now and then it hits me and I just start thinking about it again. I'm newly pregnant again so today I feel doubly paranoid of it happening again. I was on eBay chat help this aft and they asked for an advert number, I grabbed his iPad to find it and he'd changed his code. This has just set me off big time. There's only me and him that knew the code so why change it?

Do I need a kick up the arse?
Has anyone successfully tried something they'd like to share with me that might help me?

OP posts:
OohhThatsMe · 18/11/2016 17:04

Feeling you can't trust your own partner is a really awful thing. He's not doing anything to make you feel secure, is he?

TheNaze73 · 18/11/2016 17:15

I don't think it can ever fully be recovered

talesofthevillage · 18/11/2016 17:20

Has he been remorseful and tried to earn back your trust? He should be doing whatever it takes.

WeAreUglyButWeHaveTheMusic · 18/11/2016 17:29

I don't think it can ever fully be recovered

Certainly not if he isn't being transparent and has changed his codes, etc.

Yes, I think you probably do need a kick up the arse, although perhaps not in the way you were hoping.

noego · 18/11/2016 17:33

Who would you be without that thought?

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