30 day no contact/opening up for happiness

[Unrequitedlove]

How is everyone doing?
We started the 30 day no contact over the summer then Opening up for happiness thread shortly after.. I was apple.
I'm ok, moving on still, definitely do not want ex back and recognise how badly he treated me.
Would love to hear how others are doing..

What an utter utter shit he is Unrequited. It must feel horrible, but you are so much better off without him though.

Look after yourself.

Totally!
Still part of me loves him but I'm not sure why.

I can 'see' the image of them both together.. it's awful!

Unrequited ...... Cheat will always stay s stay a cheater ....... I know it is hard but you really did have a lucky escape ...... He cheated on his wife with you ..... Then you ..... Next it will be her ..... She might get down ..... Stressed then he will look elsewhere ..... You are moving on to better things ..... New year ...... Better is coming it really is ......!like Angel says in a couple of months you will think REALLY WHAT THE HELL good riddens to had rubbish xx chin up .....

Angel how are we today ?

Unrequited no MORE looking at social media ........ He really isn't worth your time X

Sorry question what is going on with you xx

Thank you donar. She is very pretty, smart etc and is similar to me.
Last time I saw him was June .
I was doing OLD etc by my heart wasn't in it. Accidentally met someone last week and we've been chatting and has invited me for a date.. although I don't think I'm ready he is really nice.
Not sure I've built up my strength again for rejection and don't want to waste my time!

Bless you ...... Then don't go ..... I think you need to take sometime to heal ..... Although up to you ? Christmas is a busy time for people ...... Please take sometime for yourself ..... Going out for a bite to eat .... Maybe good ..... Just looke after yourself and heart ....... Xx

Day 2 following the news and it is sinking in but I just feel so angry and upset.
I think I'll buy some nice new bedding. I still feel his presence iyswim but he is living a different life and has moved on..

Doner I'm good thanks. Enjoying looking forward to Christmas, keeping busy and focusing on my dd. Life is good for me at the mo .

Unrequited I don't believe you when you say you still love him. He's treated you appallingly and you know he doesn't give a damn about you. He's moved on and is quite happy playing happy families with someone else. What you are experiencing is relationship addiction. You're still addicted to him, you're not in love with him. Trying to overcome addiction is really hard and that's why you're finding it so tough. You've gone through some trauma with losing your baby and you're grasping for a closeness to your ex that you're just not going to get.

You need to somehow start detaching from him. You won't get closure from him so you need to start making plans for how you move forward because at the minute your head is stuck in a rut. Distraction is key here. Fill your time with as much as you can and eventually your mind will forget about him. Those images of him and her will be pushed out. But it does require effort on your part to keep busy. I promise that if you do this you will be in a much better place in a few months.

Definitely get the new bedding, treat it as part of a fresh start. Do lots of little things like this and they will help you on your road to getting over him.

Angle- thanks for your lengthy response.
I wanted it so much with him, or I think I did! It's been months since I've seen him and I have made small changes already. It's not the fact he's moved on particularly but who with!!
Yes, he absolutely does not give a damn!

Un. New bedding it is ......

What plans are you making ???

Angel is right you are addicted to what you thought you had ..... I have to say I think so have I and so am I .... I am finding things hard emotionally at the moment ..... Not sure why just feeling really down like I have lost my mojo ..... I have support around me and am busy with work and study .... Just feel bit lonely ...... Onwards and upwards you ladies are helping .....

Angel soo pleased you are enjoying life

Thanks Doner

One other tip Unrequited that helped me in the weeks after my breakup was I wrote a list of all the rubbish my ex had come out with. A list of all the lies he'd told me, things that annoyed me about him, times where it was evident he didn't give a damn about me, all his physically unattractive points ...etc. Every time I felt myself soften towards him or start to blame myself I read that list and it set me straight every time. It would bring out all my anger no matter how weak I felt. It really works.

That list is defunct now. I no longer need it. I already know the guy was twat and I'm embarrassed I ever went near him.

Hi all,

Could I possibly join??
Myself & my ex split on 17th November (I am pregnant with his child), he has cut me out of his life completely. I've tried to contact him through fb, text, email & his family but have had nothing but ignorance, he will simply not talk to me so I have now decided to go with NC, of course led kind of made that decision for me to be fair however I feel if I continue to try make contact, it'll just make me feel even lower & depressed!

So, I've decided to think "f*ck him" & cut him out too.
I've deleted all emails, all pictures, texts and number.
I have blocked him on facebook too so I can't stalk him as I know as soon as I see a picture, il want to go to his house, I also have a very strong feeling that he cheated on me, why else has he cut me out so suddenly?? He won't admit it simply because he won't talk to me however I can't bear to see pictures of them together!

So! I'm currently on day 1......slowly but surely il get there

Not .....: sorry to hear that ..... He is a fool to go NC .... You are having his baby ....... Sounds like he is a baby ...... Why do you think he cheated ......

When I met him, he told me how he spent 2 years with his ex gf...however things weren't great between them and apparently he cheated on her, well he then decided to start a relationship with the girl he cheated on his ex with! How did he do this?? He decided NC and cut his ex out of his life.
When he admitted he had cheated, he sounded remorseful, he said he had changed & that he wouldn't do it again, silly me believed him & now here I am.
He's 29 years old, turning 30 next month, however upon meeting him you'd think he was a teenager because that's how he acts!
He is a child & come April when I have my baby, he will think he can simply walk back into my life to have contact with him, well I won't be able to allow that, I can't spend this time healing to have him waltz back in! NC means NC for good.