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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Dh and dd

3 replies

Namechange1979 · 15/11/2016 00:57

Hi I've name changed for this.

I was sexually abused when a child so don't know if it's because if that I feel uncomfortable or not and its natural so can I ask your opinions on it and how to broach it.

Dh and dd1 (3) are very close, we all are. We are a very huggy kissy family. Yesterday when dd was sat on Dh knee they were laughing and taking about something and he moved her hair away from her neck and kissed the nape of her neck which tickled her and she moved away.

To me it felt all kinds of wrong. His brother is very touchy feely with his dd (12) and his mum - well that's a different thread all together. He also gets dd to tickle his back while we are in bed watching telly and TBH it knocks me sick to the point I've told him not to ask her.

I'm totally prepared to be told it's normal - infact I hope it is so I don't have to say anything. Im not accusing my Dh of anything nasty just that I think it's a bit too much and how would I say it?

OP posts:
Silverdream · 15/11/2016 01:31

Hi. From what you've said it sounds very normal loving relationship. I can also understand why you would be comfortable with them. Besides your past families have different levels of affection within a norm.

SandyY2K · 15/11/2016 01:40

I think it's normal for a tactile family and there's nothing sinister there, but I can understand with your background why it bothers you.

3 is very young and I'd expect the back tickles to stop as she gets older. She obviously won't be in your bed then.

My dad used to tickle us and get us to scratch his back when it was itchy as little kids. He said his dad did it as well. My dad was just rather playful and jokey.

Namechange1979 · 15/11/2016 07:02

Thank you for replying. I guess I'm over sensitive to it and probably need to explore going back to therapy.

OP posts:
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