Since being separated from stbx, for some reason a friends dh seems to think its his responsible to keep an eye on me, at first I didn't think too much of it, would pop in every now and then, message to see how things were. Then he was messaging every day, then making up excuse to come to my house for this, that or the other. Then went to messaging every morning to say have a good day, during the day and last thing at night.
I have found out that he has been stalking me on whatsapp and messenger, ie I was online and he messaged me and I didn't read or reply to his message. He had gone through his list of mutual friends, found a number of a divorced dad we both know, then he gave me the third degree about him, and what a awful shit he is etc. I wasn't even talking to him, but friends dh claims we were going on and offline at the same times...so he was clearly watching my status. Same on fb messenger, I was on there and he sends a message saying, see you are online 
.
After a recent party he and wife had argument. She doesn't like fact that he chats 'so many woman'. I don't blame her and have said so. I got a blow for blow account of their fight, including him telling me that his dw had chucked him out the house. I know that he was waiting for me to say, oh come around here, ill put you up. Except I didn't. He kept messaging saying was hungry, had no food, sleeping in car etc as dw chucked him out. I replied 'sorry' and left it at that. Next day all is sorted out and it appears he went home that night, clearly didn't get his way to come here, so made up with dw and all is sorted.
So I told him, we cannot chat anymore, not fair on wife (I thought she knew we talked from time and time as dw and I are friends too).
Now the messages coming through are just pure pathetic. 'you are my only friend', 'I NEED you' what he needs me for, fuck knows (to which I did reply that need and want are two different things.) Anyway, I just can't do it anymore and now have blocked him as its just getting so ridiculous.
So why do I feel so crappy about it???? I know I am a sucker for saying no to people as I am a big softy, but I hate being put in this position. Stalked, creeped out, got placed in the middle of a fight between him and dw.... but still, yet I feel shitty about it.
What's wrong with me?? FGS for the first time in 20 years I have some space (separated) and now I get lumbered with someone else's husbands shit.
Oh and on his whatsapp profile pic today is a sad emoji face as I haven't replied or read his messages to me WTAF!
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Relationships
Blocked a friend.... feel shitty but had to
isthismylifenow · 02/11/2016 11:13
So just a quick update. I got a message from the wife last night, Yuck and chatty you were spot on.....completely defending him, says they had fallen out after the party and he acts out when drinking etc, but has no problem with me and his friendship, but wanted to make it clear to him that in public he embarrasses her by touching other women's hair and dancing with them etc. She said it gives wrong impression to other people, and she knows I would never do anything with a married man, what with being cheated on in my own marriage. BUT... he is just caring, is a good listener blah blah blah, and doesn't want to lose me as a friend, and doesn't want him to lose me as a friend either. First I messaged back that I would reply properly tomorrow, as I didn't believe it was her at first, I thought maybe he was using her phone. Anyway, after I read message again there was one thing in there that made me think it wasn't him. So I just messaged back saying that he made me uncomfortable and I have screenshots and have emailed myself the whole chat so she is welcome to read it if she wants to. She says its not necessary and that she doesn't want this to come between us all. I just replied back to her saying 'good night'. Now you tell me...........if another woman is saying something is not right about YOUR husband and has offered for you to read the whole thread, would you say no??? I think that is very very odd. If it were me, of course I would want to know. Without spelling it out, I told her things he said has made me uncomfortable, but she doesn't want to know what was said...?? hmmmm.
I haven't approached police or reported, but I have a friend who is a police officer ( he is in same group of friends) but I know him pretty well enough to know what I say will be kept in confidence.
I see now how sheltered a life I led being married young (first boyfriend) and never really experiencing weird people and shit until now. Whether it was a good thing or not, but I unblocked him to send him a message to say that if he ever messages my daughter again there will be hell on. Then I blocked him again. I blocked him on dd's phone and told her briefly that she got any contact from either of them, to come to me right away.
I had quite a lot on over the weekend, so put it to the back of my mind, but it seems he hasn't. I will call my police friend today and just ask what the procedure is, as things are a little different here.
Thanks for all the comments, been a bit of an eye opener for me after I have written in all down and seen that its not just me that thinks this is seriously just not right. I don't know if I have just been naïve (I have no problems if you agree with this 
) but brushed off so many things, thinking that odd, but anyway..... only for it to reach this point now.
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