Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What happens when you admit you aren't coping?

11 replies

Fuckingitup · 19/10/2016 12:47

I have DC. Separated from their dad. Taking me a while to pull myself together. I really feel like I'm not coping.

What happens if I go to GP - or health visitor and admit I'm not coping?

Will he be contacted. How much of my personal health details would be shared with him?

I'm scared of the consequences but I'm struggling. I want to do the right thing for DC.

OP posts:
faffalotty · 19/10/2016 12:52

they can't share anything with him. Go and speak to someone

Fuckingitup · 19/10/2016 13:34

Really? They could have concerns and not tell a parent?

We aren't divorced yet, havent formally agreed contact arrangements. Hence my nervousness.

OP posts:
Myusernameismyusername · 19/10/2016 13:41

It would depend on the severity of the concerns, but usually this would be shared with other agencies (who can assist) not the father as a matter of course.
If you tell them you don't want him contacted and the reasons then they will agree to protecting confidentiality

faffalotty · 19/10/2016 13:54

Surely patient confidentiality means that a medical professional cannot share your medical history with anyone else without your consent?
Even if you were happily married your spouse isn't entitled to know anything.

MrsRedFly · 19/10/2016 13:57

There are other places you could contact for support eg Homestart or Gingerbread etc

rockabillyruby82 · 19/10/2016 13:59

OP, are you worried your DC could be taken away?

Fuckingitup · 19/10/2016 14:15

No rockabilly. It would not warrant that. Lower end of (utterly) unacceptable. But honestly, if mentioned at school eg, would probably prompt a referral because of what my DC might say. But I am sure would only result in help.

My problem is though how this would play out in terms of agreeing contact arrangements in legal process.

Because I am still very sure my DC are best with me with lots of contact with stbx.

OP posts:
Myusernameismyusername · 19/10/2016 16:52

If you disclose something that a HCP feels is a safeguarding issue then they will have to act on it.

Otherwise it will be noted on medical records which for a child, could be used in court if deemed necessary

Myusernameismyusername · 19/10/2016 16:54

I know it must seem like a scary step but it is much more damaging to let this concern hold you back/avoid seeking help than it is to go ask for the help and take the risk it might come up one day, or it might not

pallasathena · 20/10/2016 08:04

How are you not coping exactly?
Is it hard to get up in the morning, or do you find yourself in floods of tears frequently?
Not coping with life can be frightening for the individual and its brilliant that you've reached out for help. That's the first step.

Fuckingitup · 20/10/2016 19:13

Took a risk and talked to someone today. I actually find it very reassuring to have someone know how things have been. Thank you for taking time to respond.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page