Please tell me If my feelings are justified-So on Friday just gone it was my birthday and the night before I got a phone call to say my grandmother was dying and hadn't yet seen my 7 week old son (because I live over the other side of the country) so I dashed across with him on the Friday on the earliest train I could get taking with me as little as possible because it was so last minute and leaving my partner (the father of my baby) at home to look after my 2 children from my previous relationship, he was more than willing and a huge help getting me to the station and waving me off with a kiss and a hug, I managed to get to her on time and she thought my son was beautiful with that I took him to his other grandparents (my partners parents) so he could feed and sleep In comfort and I went back to spend more time with her all the time keeping in contact with my partner who'd been amazing apart from when I went to hold her hand and kiss her on the head while watching her die-It got to 8pm and I knew I had to leave to get back to pick up my son and go back to my mothers to settle him down so I said goodbye to her and told her we'd be back the next morning and then I left- I got back to my mothers at 9pm and messaged my partner to tell him where we were and how I was feeling and we messaged back and forward but he was taking a a while inbetween replies - After 11pm I got messages on fb inbox from a woman who we both only know from fb (she's my partners brothers friend who we've never met but she friended us both) to say that she'd been having a great time talking to him all night , how funny he was and how they were talking about her fancying his brother , my partner encouraging her to her sex with him (his bro) steal his sperm to impregnate her (jokingly) , hold him down etc and how he'd made her not feel so lonely by talking to her all night, he was sending her songs which she was then posting on her wall and also being her shoulder to cry on when she was talking about her ex taking her confidence and how she loves his brother-I politely thanked her for my birthday wish on my fb and that I was going to bed (as I had no interest in what she had to say to me after my emotional day)-I told my partner that she'd told me about their conversation and also told him I was going to bed so they could carry on having fun but the whole time wishing I'd had him at the other end of the phone for support and to hear a friendly voice on my birthday and wondering why I was having to share him ...They carried on talking and I went to sleep...The next day I woke up to find my grandmother had passed away in the early hours-I messaged him to tell him and he gave my his sympathies over messenger, I couldn't bring myself to call him after he left me without support to talk to someone else so I spent the whole day asking why he gave another woman his time and that I could never forgive him for that (he's cheated on me in the past) I was called a mental b*tch etc and to stay where I was if I didn't trust him-I told him it wasn't about trust and it was about him sharing himself around instead of giving myself and our son 100% support-I rushed back that same day to get back to my kids and it been an argument back and forward as to why he was chatting to someone else as soon as my back was turned again-his excuse "You left and I was bored and why can't I be there for her, I was also your shoulder to cry on" am I wrong for wanting both of his shoulders and wondering why he felt the need to be there for someone else when I needed him more than I ever have done before? I've not had a hug or any sort of comfort since I got home on Saturday, I've literally had no one as an emotional support-I feel completely numb and haven't even cried once because I don't know where I'm supposed to put my emotions? Do put them with my grandma, my family for losing her? Myself for losing her or my relationship which is now hanging by a thread? I've told him I want a break from us so he can work out if he wants to be single or committed 100% to myself and our son because he's let us down massively but in all honesty I don't feel like we can come back from this , I just feel numb-Last night he offered me a kiss and I hug and I refused because it's too late to offer now , we've also not shared a bed since i got back because I can't bring myself to...So mu question is , Am I justified in feeling this way or am I being unfair? Please be honest with me xx