dp looked up old flame on Facebook.

[TheoriginalLEM]

and i am not ok with it.

i know people do this and its no more than curiosity but i am really upset by it.

He said he was looking up people he knew from the past which i know to be true as old friends have contacted him. Maybe thats what started it off?

But why now? we have been together 24 years.

When i pulled him on it he got annoyed and has deleted his fb account. Or rather taken it off his phone.

I have been less sexual in recent years die to medication and working long hours but id say our sex life is healthy. He does comment though. Is this why maybe??

God, I'm head over heels with my DFiance and often have a sly glance at my ex's Facebook profile to see whether he's engaged yet what he's up to - it's idle curiosity! DFiance does the same. If I'm sat next to him on Facebook and it comes up in his search bar that he's looked her up, I might raise a jokey eyebrow (and he would respond with a jokey embarassed face!) but only because it's the sort of thing you're not really meant to do. I feel the same about it as I would if I spotted him picking his nose...

If they were texting each other then yeah, maybe things would be different, but being curious about what people from your past are up to is perfectly normal. Exes are what make us the people that our current partners love, after all...

its still grating at me

Life is better now than it has been but fuck me, its boring. Work, homework, housework, limited money bla bla bla

niw ive lost interest in sex

ive always felt thwt this person was the love of his life. I think we are possibly only still together for dd (as in we stayed togethet through difficulties for dd - and well we couldn't ever afford to split).

So yeah things are ok. But they aren't exciting. I am the sensible one who reminds him that actually no, we can't afford to buy a bike/car to restore and when would we have time??!

So maybe whilet not hankering after the person she is now, he is yearning for that lifestyle?

oh and never mind thst im practically teice the weight i was when we met.

basically i am the cliched old harridan that he would have ran a mile from if only he knew.

I honestly thought he was happy enough but deep down??

So whilst its not the action itself but the motivation

His first name doesn't start with M does it?
(Have ex of 24 years with tattoo of my name on his arm)

fuck me yes - he has katie in a huge love heart too

Thank God my name isn't Katie.
In my case, I clearly wasn't the one since he cheated and stole my car. Bastard.

I wouldn't have a clue who or what DW looks up on Facebook. Why do people monitor their husbands' online activities as if they were children?

i wasn't monitoring. i was using his lap top and he was still logged on. i didn't realise and only noticed when i seqrched for something myself. but thanks for your helpful post

Katie - looks like we had a lucky escape

Indeed we did

Over the years, I've looked up many old BFs on FB OP. It's pure curiosity/nosiness on my part. I would never have had any interest in contacting them. It's just so easy to do nowadays, especially if you're bored of an evening I wouldn't worry too much if I were you.

I also have ex of 24 years with my name on his arm. I don't talk to him fondly on fb though He was an abusive twat.

I sometimes have a scroll to see what my xh is up to. It's actually been quite cathartic. Mil was a massive issue and I'd discovered he moved away from her eventually, I was angry at first then realised not only had he moved away but he'd followed some of his dreams that she yes she because her little boy couldn't be away that long denied him. I like to think that maybe our divorce made him realise, though I strongly suspect it was a few failing relationships after that did it.

I'm also Facebook friends with a couple of exes but were friendly again before that and before dh.

One of my dm's friend contacted me via fb, and dm had me spend an afternoon trawling through to see who she knew, several of whom were old flames.

If he didn't contact her and was just having a nose then it's probably just curiosity at her life than anything else.