Do you ever get disappointed with life days?

[georgethecat]

I know it's a Sunday so probably worse & I don't feel like this always but...

I LTB & for good reason. He was a crap dad & still is. He now has a new gf 10 yrs younger. Her kids seem to always come first for him - parents eve, birthdays, days out. DS gets fobbed off with 2 hrs a week & let down regularly.

I went to a birthday party yesterday, my ds' behaviour was shit, I feel more sensitive as I'm by myself - like I'm more responsible/not coping. I'm surrounded by couples & can't help but feel shit sometimes at the way it's all worked out.

I guess in a weird way I miss my ex or who I wanted him to be. Who he is to the other children.

I read these forums and consider whether love even does exist. I look online dating and don't think I'm ready to move on after 3 yrs.

How do you stop becoming bitter & twisted? - I think I'm a high risk!!!

I think you've probably hit the nail on the head when you said maybe I miss who I wanted him to be

It is your choice and your responsibility to move on and not become bitter and twisted. It would be an awful waste to base all your future choices on someone who was, by the sound of it, just not good enough for you.

I empathise with you george, your ex sounds like mine and I have no doubts that leaving was the best thing for me and the kids, he does not have anyone else, but still no time for the kids apart from throwing them little snippets of disney dad, for which they are expected to be eternally grateful for (and sadly are) but sometimes, as tonight, I find myself feeling really down and remembering the very few good times we had, this then leads to that 'grieving for what I wanted him to be'.
How long have you been apart? I am hoping that time will heal, but like you, am worried about becoming bitter. Hopefully we are self-aware enough to stop this