Shall I let him back to live with us?

[20outof20]

A few days ago I found out by text messages (on his phone) that DP he has been sleeping with someone else, I don't care whether it was once or how long it has been going on for. I told him to leave and he did, which I appreciate, he wouldn't stop calling (I've ignored all his phone calls since I told him to leave) now he keeps on texting asking to come round and talk.

I feel devastated and numb inside, him and I got on so well together, we never ever argue. Now I am here thinking, where did I go wrong? What made him want to sleep with someone else? I am just very confused.

We have a 6 year old son together with a life threatening illness (sickle cell anaemia ) he was admitted to hospital a few weeks back because he experienced a sickle cell crisis, I waited a few hours before taking him to hospital, during those few hours I called DPs now EXs phone numerous times, he didn't answer I took DS to the hospital around 5pm he returned my phone calls after 11am the following day, he came straight to the hospital, where he was and why he didn't answer his phone when I called him was not relevant at the time because my main focus was on DS, now I can't help that he was with her during that time.

There was a series of text messages, I can't remember them word for word but the first one was her apologising saying that she is insecure because her dad.

The the other one saying that you can answer your phone to private number but not me followed bye then "please speak to me" and the last one was "one thing I regret is sleeping with you"

By those text messages I am finding it hard to figure out what exactly has been going on between him and the female in question, because it seems more than a one night stand.

Should I let him come back and live with us, just for DS's sake, he also has Aspergers and dad is part of his whole routine, if I do let him back he will think that he is forgiven and we can move on from what has happened.

But I know me as a person I could never get back with him after what he has done, I've got that image in my head of him and other woman and I can't get rid of it.

What are your thoughts please??

The fact that he continues to have no respect for your feelings says a lot.......

Go stay with a relative, you can say it's an adventure to the DC, don't let him think he can do as he pleases otherwise he will continue to disrespect you and walk all over you.

Good luck

OK, so he has decided to completely ignore your needs and wants. For me that would be the end.

What do you mean that he is there as if nothing has happened ?

He has a point though, if you are not married and it is his house then actually it is you who has to leave. What would that mean for you?

DoinItFine that's so true.

Go stay with a relative, you can say it's an adventure to the DC

I could never take DS out of his home environment, he doesn't take well to change.

RunRabbitRunRabbit meaning he is here as nothing has happened, as if I didn't find out that he is has been cheating. I am not leaving because this is where I live.

I've been lucky enough not to have a child with a serious illness but I would have thought there'd be one golden rule which would be that each of you is contactable at all times.

Whether you were in hospital with your son or not that night, your partner was obviously going to be out all night. The fact he deliberately ignored your calls (and switching his phone off is ignoring your calls) is unforgivable.

I'd be getting ready to live apart from him, OP. I'm really sorry; you're in a horrible situation.