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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Have you ever just totally gone off sex? And does it mean there is a problem?

3 replies

alltouchedout · 24/09/2016 15:39

I haven't had sex for about 3 weeks. That's a long time for us. I have just completely stopped wanting it. It's not a dh thing- I don't fancy the thought of sex with anyone. I'm very very tired (3 dc, demanding job, 12 hours a day out of the house) but that doesn't normally kill my libido completely. I haven't changed contraception. I don't feel depressed. I just don't want sex. At all. I feel weird at the thought of it.
Dh is confused. We've always had a good sex life. We've always both been up for frequent sex. He isn't demanding sex or pressuring me but he obviously wants to have sex. I'd like to want to have sex but it's as if something has turned my libido off. What do I do?

OP posts:
SooBee61 · 24/09/2016 15:42

I think you answered it yourself. You have a demanding job and 3 children. Passion killers either of them! Maybe you could get a weekend away together and dump the kids elsewhere?

SecretPrivateThings · 24/09/2016 15:48

Yes, many times. Particularly when very busy with work or kids being particularly time consuming. It's probably the tiredness. I think if you are absolutely exhausted you just prioritise rest / sleep. Frankly it wouldn't have mattered if Daniel Craig had come calling I wouldn't have been up for it.

If a weekend away isn't an option then could you manage a lie in every so often or half an hour on your own in a coffee shop for some R&R. Not trying to trivialise it, I know how frustrating it can be.

I'm not sure if this will make you feel better or not but you can come out the other side of this. My current thread is about exactly the opposite issue!

TheNaze73 · 24/09/2016 16:50

All sounds like it's a build up of other parts of your life getting in the way & affecting things. Sounds like a weekend away would be a good starting point.

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