Not really sure if this is the right topic to post under so apologies!
So I currently have 1 DC and am almost 6 months pregnant.
DP was not happy with my decision to keep the baby, for a number of reasons, but, after suffering a MC earlier in the year, I felt I wanted to keep this baby.
We have been arguing on and off for the last 6 weeks however, on Tuesday, he went and spoke with his parents and decided it would be best if he moved in with them and stays with me on weekends etc to see how we go, we watched the DVD of the scan I had to find out the sex of the baby and he had started showing an interest in my ever growing belly, which was nice and I finally thought we would be getting back on track.
Fast forward to yesterday, I picked him up and in the car he started to tell me how unhappy I make him, that I'm a liar, manipulative and a money grabber amongst other things.
When we got home he put DC in his walker and proceeded to follow me upstairs where the rowing continued and, I am ashamed to admit, I saw red and attacked him, leaving a number of scratches on his face which were bleeding and he pushed me up against the door, punching he walks beside me then put me on the flow and smacked my leg with my shoe and threw my shoe at my face, I was led on the floor crying.
I then said I would go for a drive so I went to the shops for all of about ten minutes so I could calm down and try to process what happened.
When I got back, he was crying and said he had phoned all his family to ask them to come and pick DC up as he was so angry he felt he couldn't be trusted with him, I thought this was a start as at least he admitted there was a problem and he had taken steps to try and resolve this. I made a comment about me being slagged off to his family.
Anyway, he explains his mum is coming but for me to take DC out for a while as his DM was coming to pick him up.
I did this, but didn't drive very far as it was like I was seeing stars and I certainly didn't feel safe so we returned home after 10 minutes or so and he had gone.
I was giving DC his dinner when there was a knock at the door, it was the police, his sister had contacted them to say I had attacked her brother.
So I sat down, gave a statement and answered all their questions, in between being a crying mess.
They said they would need to speak to him as well but I explained I wasn't sure where he was.
As the police were leaving, he turned up with his mum , the police went outside and said he could say bye to DC, which he did , all the while shouting at me saying he was going to get arrested (not true as the police said they just wanted to hear his side) and said if he carried on shouting at me then he would be arrested.
After about an hour, I recieved a call from the police advising they have spoken to him and they have marked the file as no further action but that I should receive a call from Lighthouse or similar today, again all fine, and the police officer explained his mum would be coming to collect some of his things.
So I then text him to ask if he wanted anything specific and I would get it ready - didn't receive a reply so I put some stuff in a bag for him.
There was then a knock at the door, it was FIL - he wouldn't speak to me other than to ask where his keys were whilst MIL waited in the car and EXDP stood across the road on the other side.
I didn't hear from him last night at all - I know he went out with some of his friends which was fine but today I still feel deeply ashamed and devestated as to what I have done and how it was left!
I start a course of CBT next week to try and help with the feelings I've been experiencing over the last 8 weeks or so as I don't want to go down the medication road just yet!
I'm not even really sure why I wrote this post but I suppose I wanted to hear other people's views or thoughts on what I should do as I am in bits
Thank you for reading!!