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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Opinions wanted please.

12 replies

Beauregard · 04/02/2007 22:12

Would you be very peed off with your dp's family if they forgot your dd2's 1st birthday and then 3 weeks later you have not had a visit or card or anything?
Dp phoned them on the evening of her birthday and subtly let it slip that they had missed her birthday ,so they are aware of the fact.
Dp's parents dont have a car anymore but their other 2 sons(dd's uncles) live wih them and both have cars so they have lifts if they need them.
My relationship with his mother is very strained as she has always made rude or snidey remarks to me despite me constantly biting my tongue for 15 years.

OP posts:
trying2bgood · 04/02/2007 22:15

yes I would be peeved.

Original poster
Beauregard · 04/02/2007 22:18

I guess im just wondering if im being too harsh because of the way i feel anyway.

OP posts:
bananaloaf · 04/02/2007 22:22

nope i would be peeved,

liquidclocks · 04/02/2007 22:23

I'd be v peeved too. 1st birthday is especisally important.

Original poster
Beauregard · 04/02/2007 22:27

I can see me and dp argueing again over this

He wont say anything whereas if it was my family i would say something.

OP posts:
zookeeper · 04/02/2007 22:32

Personally I wouldn't be peeved as our families are all hopeless about birthdays - I have fegularaly forgotten my sister's children's birthdays, for example, or remebered them later and she mine. I think we are a bit odd in that sense though as I don't know other families like ours!

Original poster
Beauregard · 04/02/2007 22:34

dp's family never bother with our birthdays which is ok by me,after all we are adults although not what my family would do ,but they have always bothered with dd1's birthday .

OP posts:
ChicPea · 04/02/2007 22:36

Do you think your MIL thinks there has been a first birthday party and you didn't invite them? If not, I think she is just not making an effort with your dd due to her attitude towards you. Sounds very immature.

Original poster
Beauregard · 04/02/2007 22:43

Thats the thing though Chicpea she is very immature.For example at dd1's party she asked me if i was going to keep the used paper plates for another time and when i said no she turned to one of my friends and remarked "Oh im obviously from a different neck of the woods to her"tossed her hair and walked off.
Obviously my friend was gobsmacked .
I have endured a tirade of her petty immature remarks but after so long and because i suffer with depression i refuse to waste my energy on her anymore.Unfortunately this doesn't prevent me from getting so angry and argueing with dp ,which i know she would love really.
About dd2 having a party and us not inviting her ,we didn't have one .

OP posts:
bandstand · 04/02/2007 23:01

awww, am sad for you, i hoe your own family (assuming you have one?) remembered, i was going to say you probaby feel worst cos it is your 2nd, but of course you woud feel bad with your first, you just feel bad anyway. dnt let it get you down. i am sure your dd2 didnt notice. Have tghey other grandhilcren?

Original poster
Beauregard · 04/02/2007 23:07

Fortunately my family are fab .
my dd's are dp's familys only grandchildren.

OP posts:
Albert · 04/02/2007 23:22

The first time this happened yes, I was very peed off. But now DS will soon be 7 and he has never received a thing from his paternal grandpa and I think only twice has DH's mum remembered (they are seperated). What shocks me most is that he is the only grandchild

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