Books on relationships

[swarri]

Does anyone know any good books about "how to talk to my wife"? My DW is missing out and our marriage is over unless I can find a way to give her what she needs, and I feel very ill equipped. Please help!

I don't know any books but can you elaborate? What is it she is missing out on?

She's missing out on emotional connection

"Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars" is a good place to start.

"Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars" is a good place to start.

No it's not, it's utter nonsense.

What do you mean, OP, "missing out on emotional connection"? What is the reason for this?

How about investigating therapy for yourself, OP? We can only help ourselves rather than trying to give someone else what they need.

Have you looked at books recommended on the Relate website?

www.relate.org.uk/relationship-help/self-help-tools/book-shop/how-do-relationships-step-step-guide-nurturing-your-relationship-and-making-love-last

Please reflect that you might equally ask, How to listen to my DW. (Same applies to listening to a DH). Emotional connection in marriage can refer to trust, prioritising your bond with your DW, doing your best to listen without being critical, taking on stresses and problems together so no-one feels unsupported. If sex or lack of it comes into this be careful not to rush to repair what you call the emotional connection with a different target in mind.

John Gottman's books are highly respected, especially as they are evidence based.

Just as importantly OP, how do you feel about it? Do you feel connected? It's a 2 way street, so don't let her pin it all on you

yes, john gottman books are very good. Try "What Makes Love Last". He also has some short stuff you can download for free - things about the Four Horsemen, etc. And a couple short exercises. Also you can try the Five love languages books.

A hand out we got from our counsellor on conflict resolution, communication types, and some relationship building techniques. Next post will have the last two pages.

Relationship building exercises.