Do you ever just cut anyone off?

[Libbyella]

An ex friend, who is also a fellow school mum, has said and done some awful things about me behind my back and just generally caused me a lot of hassle and upset over the past few years.

I've limped on, being polite and saying hello when I see her, but lately I've been thinking why the fuck should I even bother with that anymore when she's been so awful? I'd feel a lot better in myself if I took control and just ignored her. I don't much care if it causes an awkwardness or bad atmosphere as I think that she doesn't deserve my effort in even saying hello to her.

Have you ever just cut anyone off and blanked them?

I've done it too. I was always the one phoning and arranging lunch/days out etc. Then I got fed up being the only one who was trying in the friendship. I stopped phoning/texting. It's been over a year now.......

Yes I consider it one of the perks of hitting 40. It's very liberating to cut out people who don't deserve your time or friendship

It is very empowering. Also making a statement that you won't tolerate being treated like shit. I firmly believe that when you make a statement like that to yourself, your self esteem increases and you attract better people in the future.

I have just done this to a 'friend' who treated me very inconsiderately to the point of being offensive... it feels surprisingly satisfying to know that she's out of my life. She really hurt me with some of her actions and in the past I would never walk away, I'd probably think it was my fault, but now I'm strong enough to just let go and know I deserve better.

maggiethemagpie - that's so true about it being empowering.

Agree with all pp. For me it took a few years of reading mumsnet to understand it was ok to disengage. I was in a very unhealthy round of feeling guilty if I didn't give her sufficient attention and then getting pissed off when she - again - told me how inadequate I was/useless DH was/shit my life was etc. But all done under the guise of "being a good friend" and "telling the truth". All bull, she was just massively insecure and fed off others being worse off than her.
It's been over a year since I walked out of her life (after a huge Barney during which I told her to move on/make other friends) and while I still think of her frequently (we were friends for near on 20 years) I don't for a second regret walking away.
Do it, life is too short. You'll feel better. But as it's hard.

Yes, and recently. I was feeling a niggly doubt until she pulled another Single White Female move today.

Absolutely
It's give and take
You only get what you put in
Iv also done this and will never look back this person was my own mother, if people bring nothing to your life such as quality friendship respect trust and loyalty they shouldn't be in your life

Something you feel more comfortable with the older you get, when you just stop giving a toss what people think. I used to be a people pleaser and try to 'fit in' with other people. A very close friend, for whom I was a bridesmaid and supported her through health issues, has been cut out of of my live only recently. I contacted her twice at the end of last year to meet up, But she was too busy and said she would get in touch when things had quietened down. I left it 8 months, and she has not contacted me once, so I've blocked her numbers/social media (although maybe she's cut me out of her life if I haven't from her for so long!!??)

You do not owe your friendship to anyone :)