DP and I have been together for eight years and have been trying for a baby just over a year - about to start IVF as his swimmers are mainly swimming in the wrong direction.
To cut a long story short DP was abused as a child (he told me this very early into our relationship) and it has, 'in the past; (quote), made him feel the urge to DTD with the same sex. He told me that he had done this once before and wouldn't do it again but still, sometimes, has the fantasy. I told him at the time to just be honest with me, always.
We have been so strong together and I have never worried about him cheating. However, the other day, I found a message from about four months ago, to a guy on one of those casual websites. It really upset me and I confronted him about it. He told me that he hasn't done anything and that he wouldn't. I believe that he hasn't cheated (physically) anyway. It's not so much that now - he hasn't apologised. I feel like because he knows in his head that he hasn't done anything physically, he hasn't done anything wrong and has nothing to worry about or apologise for. Bearing in mind that we have been trying for a child now for a long time and he has mainly turned DTD down, with me and blamed it on being 'too scheduled'. I am upset and I don't know where to go from here, I love him so much but I feel that my trust has been betrayed and I have no idea how you get over that.
Sorry for the long message!!!!!!!!