I'm gutted, this morning, it happened again, I've been dumped.
I'd been with him for two years and to start with our relationship was great. He was kind, loving, open, everything I wanted. Then his divorce started. He became very bitter and guarded over his emotions, he said he didn't know if he could ever love anyone again - this was may 2015. I've been feeling totally insecure since then, constantly worried he'd dump me and I never got any reassurance otherwise. I never got any emotion back from him and not once in 2 years did he say he loved me, only that he wasn't sure he ever could. I've regularly been hurt by his non feelings, constant rejection (in the bedroom too), and the fact that he never said or did anything nice to me, but I loved him and I (and he allegedly) were hopeful he could become that loving, kind person again. Until yesterday when he said he wanted to be on his own and not see me that night. Rejected and hurt again I went home. Today he has said he's got no emotion to give me and is better off on his own, he doesn't want a lifelong partner and it's best we say goodbye. I'm devastated. I've been there through thick and thin, his divorce, awkward kids, death of his father and just when things were getting on track for his life, I'm pushed away. I don't know how to feel, hurt, angry, used but mainly gutted. I've wasted two years of my life 18 months of which hoping that things will get better when the divorce was over, when his work was less stressful, when the kids weren't being so difficult etc. I feel a bit stupid too for letting it carry on, hoping it'd be worth it in the end if I could just have that person back that I first met 2 years ago.
Sorry for rambling, needed to get this off my chest in an attempt to feel better.