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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Petty but annoying thing friend says

7 replies

TowerRavenSeven · 27/08/2016 23:54

This is petty but it is annoying me. After years of a friend (happily married, nice but average looks) convinced every man was after her every time we went somewhere, she has now transferred it to her teenage daughter.

I'm just tired of, "oh the boys in 'Victorias' class are trying to help her in class, I think they like her'. 'Victoria' is a very nice girl and I wouldn't be surprised if the boys do like her. But all the time, everywhere, and then the inevitable 'Oh I'm not ready for this!' Not only is she ready for it, I think most of the time she's reading (way, way) into something that isn't there.

Before its brought up I have a teenage boy who is not girl crazy yet so I'm not another mum of a teenage girl that's jealous! I mean what do I say to that? Probably 'that's nice' and change the subject. I'm kind of embarrassed for her to be honest.

OP posts:
pallasathena · 28/08/2016 07:08

Sounds like a drama queen to me. There's a lot of it about these days!

Walkacrossthesand · 28/08/2016 07:26

Yup - say 'that's nice' and change the subject - preferably to one involving meaningful activity/achievements rather than catching the eye of a boy. I presume you have other things in common to keep this friendship going?

BroomhildaVonShaft · 28/08/2016 07:37

'I dunno, maybe they just like her as a person? She must have some male friends who aren't trying to get off with her! Haha'

It's very sad that she's focussing on her daughter's looks as the thing that makes boys want to hang out with her. Shame.

CookAt180 · 28/08/2016 08:06

Her: "oh the boys in 'Victorias' class are trying to help her in class, I think they like her"
You: "yes she'll probably be pregnant by 16. I'd be so worried if it was my daughter."

problem solved

Resilience16 · 29/08/2016 22:35

Next time she starts with the "all the boys" spiel, try asking " and how does that make you feel?"
You might be surprised by the answer.

Iflyaway · 29/08/2016 22:48

Do you really have nothing to say to her apart from this?...

You can change the subject you know. You are not her puppet.

Be honest, and tell her you don't like that kind of talk. I would hate it. Otherwise you are just indulging her.

The alternative, find friends who resonate with you.

She sounds very shallow anyway, and I'd not want to be around her and her daughter X years down the line...

At the end of the day it's up to you who you want around in your life.

Iflyaway · 29/08/2016 22:54

Oh, and what do her "nice, but average looks" have to do with it....

Judgemental is an awful place to be, because it does not bring any happiness.

Having that attitude does not make you a nice person. I spot a sign of jealousy and projection. Best to concentrate on making your own life the best you can be! Smile

Live for today. Tomorrow is promised to no-one.

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