I am so screwed up

[Thisismyalias]

I might as well start at the beginning.

My dad died 5 weeks ago. One of my biggest fears was my dad dieing. I'm not scared of anything anymore.

I am in a long distance relationship with someone who loves the bones of me. And I did him up until my dad died.

But something has changed, I just don't feel anything anymore.

Is it just grief, or am I going nuts?

Oh I also have a fresh (the past week) diagnosis of bipolar 2 so woop woop

I dunno. I'm just so confused.

So sorry for your loss

IME, grief can make you feel numb to any other emotions. Don't make any big decisions right now.

I think it is probably the result of the loss of your Dad. If I were you, I would concentrate on your grief and put all other thoughts out of your head right now. As your partner lives a distance away you can give yourself the time to all your sad news to sink in and remember your lovely Dad. A family death has a massive impact on your life - don't underestimate the way it will alter your perspective. Sorry for your loss. Take care

So sorry for your loss. Someone dying can alter your feelings for a time. Do you mind me asking if you have been put on medication since your diagnosis? That can affect things too.

Sorry to hear you are going through a pretty shitty time. Give yourself time to heal and for any any new meds to kick in before you make any big decisions but it might be worth talking to your partner about how overwhelming it all is. A problem shared and all that x

I've been put on a mood stabiliser, but I've only been taking it a couple of days. Hopefully it'll level me out.

Thank you all for your kind words. I asked him for some time and space to sort my shit out.

I think I need some grief counselling or something. I haven't really even started to deal with it.

So sorry for your loss.

I agree with the others that grief can make you numb so this is not the right time to make a big decision regards your relationship.

It's probably harder because your relationship is long distance.

Persevere with your meds and reassess how you feel in a month or so. I also think seeking counciling will help you process how you are feeling . It's so much better to speak to someone who's not involved in a situation.

If your partner really cares for you he'll understand and give you the time and space you need to heal. Just be honest with him.

This happened to me 33yrs ago come November 20th. Losing my dad when he was 45 was just about the most painful thing one could imagine. And I remember feeling numb, but coping with babies & life etc. I fell to pieces a year or so later. I didn't make life changing decisions & just muddled through. Since then my mum & dear in-laws have died. Each brought a whole new episode of grief to deal with. I worked with this. It was difficult.

Please don't be hasty to make life-changing decisions. Be kind to yourself. So sorry for your grief.

my dad recently passed away, and I too have a bipolar diagnosis. I can't offer many words of advice, but just know if you ever fancy a chat I am here to listen. Stay strong darling x