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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Friend's husband flirting... mention it?

9 replies

Oncemoretwicemore · 16/08/2016 21:20

DH and I are part of a group of couples. One of the other husbands recently took to messaging me on Facebook late at night, clearly the worse for wear. He hasn't made an overt pass at me but I believe was either fishing or just getting his kicks from messaging me.

(The most recent message was a wide-eyed reference to something semi-personal I was discussing with the women at a recent meeting, which he overheard. I told him to ask his wife as she'd been there.)

When he persisted a few days later I told him I wasn't keen on his tone, and that I'm happily married. He apologised and hasn't been in touch since.

Should I say anything to his wife? I haven't seen her alone since he first contacted me but also don't want to make a mountain of a molehill.

OP posts:
DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 16/08/2016 21:21

Nope,leave it unless he does it again .

MorrisZapp · 16/08/2016 21:22

Nah leave it.

Overthinker2016 · 16/08/2016 21:25

This kind of happened to me - not quite so overt but my bfs friends started messaging on FB.

I eventually just didn't reply and he's taken the hint. I also mentioned it to my bf as I wanted him to be aware - I didn't want the friend making out I had encouraged it.

I think facebook makes it a lot easier for these sorts of wankers. I was trying to be polite to start with (as its someone we socialise with) but thought fuck this for a laugh at the point I realised I was letting politeness make me feel awkward.

Overthinker2016 · 16/08/2016 21:26

The guy in question didn't have a gf or wife so I've not really helped with your query. Was just trying to say that don't feel you have to be polite. He is not bothered about making you feel awkward.

AnyFucker · 16/08/2016 21:29

Sounds like you have it under control. I wouldn't do any more at this point unless he starts making a nuisance of himself.

Oncemoretwicemore · 16/08/2016 22:09

Thanks, will leave it unless he messages again

Overthinker I think I would have felt awkward in the past but happily this time I felt confident shutting him down and am strangely proud of myself for not being especially polite in answering his (hopefully) last message.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 16/08/2016 22:12

Good for you

Feelingsandtears · 16/08/2016 22:14

I would leave it.
Two years ago I was staying at a friends and I was asleep on sofa.
Her husband woke me up in a towel and asked if I wanted to join him in the shower....
Didn't say anything to friend,just avoid him like the plague

Overthinker2016 · 16/08/2016 22:15

Good!

Sounds like a complete wanker.

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