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Original poster

Parents babysitting

13 replies

Hurtandconfused2016 · 07/08/2016 21:56

Hey everyone

Just want some people's views on this. So I have had to return to work early due to money problems.

Now kids dad/family are no longer in their life. My ds never got into nursery he's 3 so I am appealing this dd is only 5 months old.
My parents are going to be looking after them whilst I am at work but they have now asked that I give them 100 a month for childcare.
I could put both kids in private nursery and it would cost less but my mother won't let me put dd into nursery (She hates baby nursery).
My problem is I can't really afford that a month (i only work 3 long shifts) but I can't work more to afford it as I have no other childcare.
Should I go against my mother and put them in private nursery? What are people's views on baby nursery

OP posts:
offside · 07/08/2016 22:21

They are your children, not your mother's, you do what you want and what makes financial sense for you. It's nothing to do with your mother.

SandyY2K · 07/08/2016 22:26

You can get nursery for less than £100 a month?

If it's cheaper for you, then do it. It's your child not your mum's.

Baby nursery is fine.

dlwelly · 07/08/2016 22:33

Whereabouts are you? Just curious as putting my daughter in baby nursery 2 mornings a week costs me around £250 a month!

I absolutely love nursery, I think it's great for her to be around other children and to get used to a formal setting. The ratios are lower than normal nursery so they get lots of care (nappy changes, someone to have their bottle/cuddle with) and they do sensory activities and craft things that she probably wouldn't do otherwise.

My mum has her a few times a week and they both love it but it's very different. My mum will pop to the shops with her and get her washing done whilst my daughters there etc. They go to soft play and get toys out too but it's different to nursery!

Money is tight so you need to go for the cheapest option and I'm sure your mum will understand this (if she's that desperate to have them then she'll lower her price!)

If not so

dlwelly · 07/08/2016 22:34

Oops, not sure what was going to come after if not so...

Eva50 · 07/08/2016 22:46

Did you mean £1000. Do what you think best for you.

maras2 · 07/08/2016 22:51

All 3 of my grandchildren went to nursery 3 days a week from the age of 6 months.DH and I had them for the other 2.Kids were fine.The 2 eldest are at school now so we just have the 3 year old but all kids benefitted from baby nursery and are very bright and sociable.We didn't take any money for child minding as their nursery fees were astronomic.As for your mum not letting you put them in nursery Shock Not really her call to make is it? Where on earth can you get even 3 day/week nursery care for less than £100? Is there no chance that their father can contribute towards the fees or is he as deadbeat as he sounds?Good luck anyway.I know it's not easy.

MrsJoeyMaynard · 07/08/2016 22:55

The nursery DS2 goes to charges about £40/day for babies under two years old. Getting nursery care for a baby plus an older child for under £100/month sounds unusual to me. Was £100 a typo?

However, if you can afford private nursery but can't afford to pay your parents, it doesn't sound like you have a lot of choice about it.

Pearlman · 08/08/2016 08:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cabrinha · 08/08/2016 08:19

It's not your mum's place to "let" you. What an odd ting to say.
I'd understand if you said "my mum hates them - could I get some outside opinion?"
This is about your choices, not going against anyone!
Have you visited any nurseries?

My child didn't start until 12 months and I was glad I have saved enough to stay with her. But - she then joined lots of other babies who had been in from 6 months (or earlier) and they were all happy.

DragonsEggsAreAllMine · 08/08/2016 09:43

If nursery for two is less than £100 then of course up you can work more.

Three days work a month isn't going to pay the bills unless you have a super rare very well paid job.

If you parents are willing to help then surely the sensible thing to do is up your hours and let them.

TheHubblesWindscreenWipers · 08/08/2016 12:52

Your mum has absolutely no authority over what you do.
Do what's best for you.

Floozie66 · 08/08/2016 12:57

Souns like your mum is coercing you to not put kids in nursery so she can earn a nice little salary for herself-very selfish and not really being a nice parent to you or grandparent by trying to financially exploit you

NerrSnerr · 08/08/2016 15:01

It is your choice. My daughter went to nursery from 12 months and she loves it. Is £100 a month right? My daughter is in 4 days a week and it costs £700 a month and that's just for her!

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