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Original poster

Dating a virgin!!

27 replies

happyandsingle · 03/08/2016 22:44

Been talking to a man abroad online. We speak via phone and skype. He lives in a non eu country so probably nothing will happen any way but last night talking he confessed he is a virgin and hes 32!!
I was a little rude in my response because I was shocked and for some strange reason it really turned me of him and i cant explain why.
How would you feel about dating or sleeping with a virgin. I really hate the idea of being a mans first or maybe its just me!!

OP posts:
celeste83 · 03/08/2016 22:46

I'd give a virgin a go, not nice to add to the stigma they must feel. Fair play to him owning up. Not sure about the long distance relationship however...

NeedAScarfForMyGiraffe · 03/08/2016 22:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ToastedOrFresh · 03/08/2016 22:49

I'm going to be sceptical here. Is it just something to get your attention ? Some men like to be the first man a woman has. Does he assume women have the same fantasy ?

Original poster
happyandsingle · 03/08/2016 22:50

I use the term dating but we really just chatting for now and maybe meet up in future but I am still open to dating someone right now if I met the right person here.

OP posts:
Original poster
happyandsingle · 03/08/2016 22:52

The country he comes from you basically have to marry the girl before she will have sex with you so its probably true.

OP posts:
celeste83 · 03/08/2016 22:53

I have no problem with internet dating but its just the distance betwen you two, how on earth would it ever work?

Original poster
happyandsingle · 03/08/2016 22:56

He wants me to come over at some point for a visit.

OP posts:
Original poster
happyandsingle · 03/08/2016 23:00

I just wanted other opinions about dating a virgin. The idea of an inexperienced man turns me off just wanted to know if im being unreasonable or if others would feel the same.

OP posts:
celeste83 · 03/08/2016 23:05

The idea of an inexperienced guy sounds appealing in the way that you can teach him and nuture him to do things the way you like it i suppose Wink

ApocalypseSlough · 03/08/2016 23:12

The long distance/ not yet met is the issue here.

Queenbean · 03/08/2016 23:13

This sort of rings alarm bells in a "British grandmother marries a Turkish waiter" type way

Is there any chance he's more interested in a visa than you?

feralgoat · 03/08/2016 23:16

what queen said

Original poster
happyandsingle · 03/08/2016 23:18

Well im 37 and hes 32 so im not a grandma. And no neither of us want to marry each other. He doesnt want to live here anyway. AnyWay distance will prob make it an impossible situation but hes hot and I enjoy our chats and video calls so even if thats it its fun for the time being.

OP posts:
Original poster
happyandsingle · 03/08/2016 23:21

you cant get visa just by marrying someone it doesnt work like that anymore anyway

OP posts:
feralgoat · 03/08/2016 23:53

get off the computer and find a real live man

TheNaze73 · 03/08/2016 23:56

School holidays in full swing I see Biscuit

ahsan · 04/08/2016 00:02

He's bullshitting seen plenty of men pretending to be virgins. He's not, in our culture your not suppose to mess about but guess what men and women do before marriage. Wouldn't buy what he says for a second. Hmm

Original poster
happyandsingle · 04/08/2016 00:08

Feral thanks for the insult but if im having fun and not harming anyone whats the problem? I can find plenty of real men its just a shame this one happened to live so far away.
I came on here with the original question and as usual its totally changed topic.
Im not asking for a relationship analyis im asking about dating a virgin ffs.

OP posts:
Original poster
happyandsingle · 04/08/2016 00:10

Hes not muslim. From eastern europe

OP posts:
feralgoat · 04/08/2016 00:13

you're not dating him

Original poster
happyandsingle · 04/08/2016 00:17

Ok let me put it as I am not dating a virgin but I would feel weird if I did date one how would others feel?

OP posts:
Pendu · 04/08/2016 00:33

My DH was a Virgin when we married - it's pretty much the "norm" where he's from. Suited me as I can be kinda jealous Blush . We only slept together after marriage also - it's just not an issue for some people .

OutToGetYou · 04/08/2016 21:26

I dated a guy in my late 30's who was 34 and was either a virgin or had only ever had sex once or twice.

In terms of the 'dating', he was very needy and intense. Talking about moving in with me within weeks, without any encouragement from me. I had to go to Oz for work for a month and he started looking for projects with his co that meant he could be there at the same time - that was when I ended it.

As for the sex - well, you'd think he'd invented it, but he wasn't very good at it. I simply didn't have the patience to explain stuff to him. The first time we started to get jiggy he came in his underpants. That was pretty unattractive. Also, everything worried him - you know, a little slip, a bit of blood, a funny noise.....all the stuff you ignore or laugh off, he couldn't take in his stride. He also wanted to do it ALL the time, literally one night tried to set the alarm for 2am after we were going to sleep at midnight so he could wake up and do it again. I vetoed that idea.

I only saw him for a few weeks and it was all too much for me.

MummyBex1985 · 04/08/2016 21:37

I couldn't do it. I need a bloke that knows what he's doing. I don't have time to be a teacher.

It also puts me off massively but like you, I'm not really sure why. At 18 I'd probably have found it endearing.

MammouthTask · 04/08/2016 21:42

It seems that I'm very lucky then that my first boyfriend didn't flinch at the idea then... I was 28yo so not that far from the age of that bloke too.

TBH? You have been a virgin too and someone took the time to be your 'teacher' (even if that guy was was just as inexperienced, he did all the 'hard work' with you).
Even though teaching might be a too big word for that anyway.