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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

OH dating site

9 replies

juicee13 · 03/08/2016 20:29

I'm in an emotionally abusive relationship which is why I just need to double check my own reactions because I don't trust my own mind anymore.

While I was pregnant last year someone I knew approached me and said that my OH was on a dating site, she thought he must've forgotten to take his profile down or something. I checked it out, he was there with recent photos etc. We had a big argument and heart to heart and he won me over with promises and bullshit. I made a decision to just trust him, didn't want to be checking his phone and whereabouts as I couldn't torture myself with paranoia. He told me he'd forgotten the password for the account so couldn't close it down.

I just read another thread on here and something in my gut told me to search for his profile again (just through Google, I'm not on and never have been on any) and it was there. He's changed his name to a fake one but everything else is the same.

We are 14 months further along, we now have a 1 year old and we were supposed to be getting married abroad next month.

This is the relationship over isn't it?

OP posts:
Pearlman · 03/08/2016 20:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cabrinha · 03/08/2016 20:32

Yes it is Flowers

FreeFromHarm · 03/08/2016 20:38

So Sorry, but cancel the wedding, you deserve better

ITCouldBeWorse · 03/08/2016 20:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sqooobado453 · 03/08/2016 20:46

Yes. Can you tell someone in RL?

Candlefairy101 · 03/08/2016 20:58

How did you managed to find him on Google when he had changed his name on the dating site?

Would just like your advice on how you did it?

Original poster
juicee13 · 03/08/2016 21:55

Thanks everyone. I am gutted, angry, ashamed, embarrassed and I feel sick. I don't know who to turn to as he's almost alienated me completely.

I knew which site he was on previously so I googled his 1st name, age, town and the sites name and his profile came up. So I half signed up to the site and one of the first suggestions to me was fake name my OH. He may well be on other sites too but I can't be arsed to search, I've got all I need already.

Luckily I own everything, the house was my mums, my car was from her inheritance I even paid for his motorbike. He's a nasty, sponging user who refuses to work so he'll leave here with a bag of clothes only. He even stated on his profile he has no kids!!

OP posts:
Bogeyface · 03/08/2016 22:00

Thank God you found this now instead of after you were married, he would have rinsed you for everything.

Kick his sorry arse out pronto.

Whereabouts are you? I am in the East Mids and always happy to make new friends :)

Cabrinha · 03/08/2016 22:02

Well as you've paid for everything thank fuck you looked before getting married Shock

Good luck now. And do not be ashamed or embarrassed - this is not your fault.

But harness angry! Angry is good!

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