Help!!! dh and i want to marry but pull it off as our first wedding complicated....

[rosebud1980]

dh and i got married two years ago after ds was born just for financial reasons at the time we planned to remarry properly at a later date. The thing is we never told anyone as we were scared about their reactions and now as times gone on its harder to break the news. We thought we could renew our vows etc only to find out we cannot say the contractial words.We really dont know what to do.It was conpletely crazy and i blame it on my pregnancy hormones as it was a month after he was born that we did it.

It's not illegal to get married to the same person twice, but it is illegal to tell the lies to public officials that you'd have to tell in order to get someone official to marry you the second time.

I think your options are

a. If you're now in a different area from the one in which you got married the first time, just go ahead and apply for marriage licence and get married again pretending to everyone including officials that you didn't get married two years ago. This will involve you breaking the law, and I don't recommend it, but it would be perfectly possible. I know of a friend of a friend who did this.

b. Plan a blessing (in church) or a humanist ceremony (anywhere else), set the date and then come clean with your mother and MIL about what you did. You can blame postnatal hormones and also lay it on thick about how you only saw that marriage as a legal formality, while this is what you see as your real wedding. I really think this is the best option.

c. Something along the lines of what lulabelle suggests. But then you're going to have to field objections from your mother and MIL anyway and I suspect the whole story would come out anyway.

Thanks lemonaid i guessed it would be breaking the law somehow. Has anyone elase had a blessing?

most blessing are exactly the same as a wedding but without signing the register so I think set a date then come clean........perhaps you could ask them if you'd rather stayed in the hole where you were living or moved to the much better mq and see what they say.......