'Sorry love I've not drunk enough grog to 'do' you.' 😳

[MissusWrex]

Dp said this to me about an hour ago, he'd just come back from his uncles funeral.

I mentioned that he looked damn good in his suit. He made a suggestive comment about tomorrow. So I asked wh

I doubt it's the carers thing. Even if you mum was carer in day while he at work presume he was at home with you and kids from say 6pm- 8am. Not like it was shock and change in what's he's done previously. Still shitty thing to say

winchester & oddsock both beat me to it. If this was flipped, the reaction would've been completely different

If he's, otherwise, a decent guy, he probs didn't mean it. Don't take to heart.

If he's normally a nice person I'd leave it. Just after a funeral is normally an emotional time.

Ok fair enough.

I'll just say again though I didn't come on to him, just complemented him. He mentioned sex.

And I'm not upset that he didn't want sex. I'm upset that he suggested he needed more beer than he'd currently had to have sex with me.

Anyfucker we have a mutal agreement not to click on 'Threads I'm on' for sanity's sake. Dp comes on here for support re: me too so we tend to just search our threads instead.

Verdict received: I'll move on from it.

Unwell enough to need a full time carer, yet you're up for sex after having a baby only 6 weeks ago!

I honestly would be hurt by his comment too. I'd try not to read anything into it until the upset of the funeral has passed and he is 100% sober. Have a talk with him then, and explain the same as you have on this thread. Better than storing up anger/hurt feelings.

Well, either he wanted to be a cunt or he said (for some reason) what he really thought in this moment... Which is understandable after coming from a funeral and probably being really tired (btw, congrats on the birth of the LO !!).

Talk to him tomorrow. If he is sorry then I'd chalk it up to being stressed, tired & sad (I sometimes can't have intercourse without having a drink to relax...). If he continues to make barbed remarks... Well, that would be really messed up!

Look, I don't think op was actually saying "come and fuck me now"

She said he looked good in his suit. Men look nice in suits. Especially ones that don't wear them that often. Not sure why you are getting none too subtly ripped apart, Missus.

Is there any chance he meant he'd need to be drunk to consider sex today because he'd been to the funeral and is feeling quite down (ie nothing at all to do with how he feels about you, but that he's upset after the funeral)?

I suffer from horrible foot-in-mouth-itis and tend to say really things without them meaning to come out the way they do at all so I'm wondering if that's what happened here?

I'm not unwell ItsNotYou I'm disabled. Still capable of having sex thankfully 😄

I was only 'up for it' if he was offereing. I certainly wasn't pestering just mildly curious as to why he said 'tomorrow'.

Yes I might mention it upset me tomorrow and why after I've thought about it a while, not great at verbally expressing myself.

It upset me but it he can't have meant it that way really can he?

I definitely didn't mishear him.

If he's not usually drunk to DTD then there's nothing to worry about. It sounds like what he meant just came out the wrong way. Enjoy your, ahem, "romancing" tomorrow.

Flisspaps that's very possible. He could have meant that.

Anyfuckerexactly. The suit doesn't come out often and it was for a sad occasion but he does look fantastic in it.

I sometimes don't notice when people wear different things or make an effort. So when I do notice I make sure to compliment them!

When posters have suggested he's a bit of an arse, you've argued & when other posters have said he probably didn't mean it, you didn't take that on the head either.

What is it you want people to say, op? Do you want sympathy, reassurance?

Disclaimer: not meant to come across as harsh.

I think Flisspaps' explanation is the correct one.

Whoop because I have often misinterpreted things spectacularly in the past I wanted to know if that was what I was doing.

There have been some very good suggestions as to what dp might have meant and that has helped me feel less hurt.

It takes me a while before I can organise thoughts enough to talk about them face to face, especially if they have made me emotional.

I can type away quite happily though, I've always found mn is a good sounding board to help with this.

Even if what he actually meant was 'I'm upset about the funeral and I'd really rather wait for a bit longer after you gave birth to have sex, so, please, not now', it's a pretty weird thing to say it. I mean, it sounds like the kind of things a bunch of blind drunk fuckwits would say about some women in a pub who are minding their own business: 'Don't fancy yours much'/'Oi, I'd need a lot more grog before I'd do the brunette' etc etc.

To be fair OP already said she accepted the advice / interpretation.

Personally OP I'd close the thread, (ask for it to be deleted or hide it), its one of those throw away comments, its happened. People will now rip apart you OP and comments, and I think that is had to interpret, accept and may leave you emotionally worse off .

You sound like your in a good relationship enjoy it, and that cute little baby of yours.

I think he wasn't feeling like it today for all the reasons people have said but liked the idea of having sex soon so he mentioned it for tomorrow. Then an awkward attempt at banter/an excuse came out when you suggested today. Because he just wasn't feeling like it and thought he'd have to be drunk to feel like it. Nothing to do with you. That's what I think :)

In the absence of any history, I agree with Fliss too