How to make MIL bugger off, without being blatantly rude?

[sleepfinder]

Ok I won't go into particular details about the heinous emotional deficiencies of my MIL but if anyone can help on how to make her give us a bit more SPACE I'd be gratful.

We used to see her 3-4 times a year, when we absolutely had to - her birthday, near Xmas and twice inbetween.

Now we have a 4 month old baby its almost every fortnight I get some form of request to visit and its just soooooooo
unbearable!

agree you are unfair

as bananaloaf suggested - screen your calls

when you do have contact repeat....
"sorry we are busy then"
"sorry we are busy then"
"sorry we are busy then"
"sorry we are busy then"

Can I ask if your mother is still living? If so, what part does she play in your sons life?

MIL lives closer than my mum, & as a consequence my kids are closer to MIL & FIL. I have a strained relationship with my father, so I don't encourage their bond. My parents have 16 grandchildren anyway & are close to some more than others.

However I love seeing the pleasure the IL's get from their only two granchildren (at times we have suspected they favoured dd but a chat after xmas cleared a lot of stuff up)

Fabulous insight there 100percentcod. Many thanks

Ah, yes, if you're unhappy with how she treats her other grandkids, you can hardly trust her to mind your son! (My MIL is annoying, but not neglectful or evil or anything. She does have a very different parenting style, but it isn't abusive or dangerous, so I think it's good for my kids to be exposed to it, within reason.)

I think people who only have reasonable family (and ILs) can't understand what it's like to be related, one way or another, to people you wouldn't trust with a dog, never mind a child.

thats a very good note to end this thread on NQC - so I'm off for now. THanks for helping keep a balanced outlook, thanks v much.