Pregnant and low ebb

[bumbleclat]

I don't know if this should be in relationships but I'm 9 weeks pregnant and my mood has just dropped today after weeks of just fighting along through sleepless nights and feeling ill nearly all the time.

The straw that broke the camel's back was the events of today.

Since before this pregnancy, my mum's been undergoing intense chemo which is really knocking her for six- I visit her on Saturdays which is a 6 hour round trip and I hate driving so far alone. (DH's DD stays ev oth wkend so can't expect them to come)

My dad and his partner (who I adore) split up earlier this year because he'd fallen for another women, who he now lives with so any sense of family or base/ get-away has gone and I miss it.

Im clinging on by my finger nails as a school (teacher) and have just found out that my judgements are being moderated and I haven't got enough evidence to show the moderators so I'm worrying about work and not only working all week but Sunday too.

To top it off I'm only 31 but so have slight arthritis and had to do a 2 hour walk with my class today which has completely @*#ked my back and hips.

Nothing is comfortable at the moment and Im feeling quite alone.

I don't know why I'm posting really it's like my DH is just used to things being a bit rubbish for me so he doesn't realise how much I'm struggling because I'm always so strong.

:(

What can I do to find done kind of lightness or joy/ peace?

TIA

Hello bumble. Sorry you're feeling like this. Try not to be hard on yourself. You ARE coping despite the circumstances, which is something to feel proud of.

I think things will improve as the pregnancy develops, until it settles after the first few weeks? But in the meantime, can you take a day to just relax, do something for you? Even an hour with a magazine, a long bath, painting nails, or a favourite tv show with some chocolate?!

I understand why you're worried about work, but, you're struggling with things outside work, and I think you should raise it, so they know. Also think you should talk to DH, because once you've shared it, you'll feel less alone.

Can you take an hour for yourself today?

I think mainly you need to be gentle on yourself, drop your standards like a stone where you can, and ask for extra help.

When I was at a similar stage of pregnancy, my mum was diagnosed with in incurable brain cancer and my pregnancy had complications. So I understand your overwhelmed feeling. Sometimes a lot happens at once and I honestly think you have to pace yourself and wait for the upturn. You also need to take time to feel proud of yourself for just getting through it.

Thanks so much, I have told work and they were amazing until now where they've just got used to me soldiering on and none asks how my mum's getting on any more I wonder if it's because they think I should just be happy all the time about being pregnant.

Thanks halfwayoranges I instantly thought of a toffee crisp bar whilst I'm travelling down to the hospital.

I'm enjoying a lie in now before the long journey to the hospital and DH is making waffles downstairs.

I'll enjoy my micro freedoms where they arise and like you said crazyhead drop my standards where I can too.

So sorry about your mum crazyhead you're right things do come all st once sometimes.