Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Having serious wedding jitters - days to go

14 replies

BathSuds · 27/04/2016 17:27

Getting married in 12 days time and I'm having serious jitters which are scaring me. I like quiet life. I'm a solitary creature and I keep day dreaming about living on my own, with a dog. Maybe casually dating but coming home to my dog and pjs. No demanding in laws to worry about. No step kids to worry about. My time and money would be my own. My choices and decisions would be my own. Why am I day dreaming about this as though it's a fantasy?

OP posts:
Offred · 27/04/2016 17:31

Because you don't want to get married I think...

Lilaclily · 27/04/2016 17:32

How long have you been with dp?
Do you leave together ?
If not I'd seriously consider living together first

Do you get on with in laws and step kids to be ?

TendonQueen · 27/04/2016 17:34

What made you decide you did want to get married?

ALaughAMinute · 27/04/2016 17:36

Wedding day jitters or serious doubts?

Don't go through with it if you're not sure.

Twitterqueen · 27/04/2016 17:39

I think you need to call off the wedding. Absolutely DO NOT go through with it if you have the slightest doubt. Divorce is just awful.

I used to daydream like you. I got divorced and now I'm living the dream Wink. I know myself. You seem to know yourself.

At the very least, put it off for six months. You'll be able to gauge whether or not you really want to get married by the enormity of your relief at not having to do it in 12 days' time...

expatinscotland · 27/04/2016 17:40

'No demanding in laws to worry about. No step kids to worry about. My time and money would be my own. My choices and decisions would be my own. Why am I day dreaming about this as though it's a fantasy?'

Because you don't want to get married, at least not to this guy. Just reading your own post, I wouldn't, either.

Cancel it.

Summerlovinf · 27/04/2016 17:40

What would be the pros of getting married? You've listed the cons.

Gazelda · 27/04/2016 17:42

It needn't be a daydream or a fantasy. It could be reality.

Have you been feeling this way for a while? Has anything recently happened to bring on the daydream?

Nanny0gg · 27/04/2016 18:18

Do you love him? Has he any idea how you feel?

Is it being married that you don't want or is The Wedding that you don't want?

eddielizzard · 27/04/2016 18:54

how long have you felt this way? sounds very reasonable to me. if you have doubts, better to cancel. awful at the time but nowhere near as awful as a divorce.

TheNaze73 · 27/04/2016 20:15

Don't do it. Just don't

piglover · 27/04/2016 20:33

Do you feel like this generally? That it's nice to shut the door and have time on your own away from other people's demands? If so, maybe you are just a natural introvert and crave space away from others. It doesn't necessarily mean that you shouldn't get married, provided that your prospective spouse understands that and can give you space and privacy for recharging your batteries. I am completely devoted to my spouse and love my life with her and being married to her, but sometimes I just need to be by myself for a bit.

But if this is all very specific to getting married, then I agree with others on here.

Maverick66 · 27/04/2016 20:50

It is what it is ....... Pre wedding nerves Wine

eddielizzard · 27/04/2016 20:53

errr maverick and what are the divorce statistics? maybe pre-wedding jitters = shouldn't get married!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread