My mum is convinced sister is neglecting her kids

[TLV]

that says it all really, she has a teenage dd and a 8yr ds, she works alot (out of choice) no partner on the scene, my mum keeps telling me how there is never any food in the house its untidy, her ds has nits and keeps getting them and she isn't treating it properly, she gets home and lets her dd do the running round, at the weekend her son rang my mum and was basically home alone (apart from his grown up cousin who is living in a room just outside the house) there was no heating on he was cold and he had nits, she seems to have lost the plot (and she is 35yrs old) no one will talk to her and as I've just started working with her I don't know what to do, my mum is worrying her self sick and to top it all off she met a bloke a few months ago from Jersey and has been texting him and he is coming up in a few weeks and will be going to hers (she doesn't even know him!!!!)

Oh dear. How old is the teenage dd? Old enough to take responsibilty when your Sister is working? Not that it should all fall to your Niece, but when needs must.

This is a bit like my Sister. We've just had huge issues with her over the treatment of her ds (9). She too has a bf who she's been with 9 months approx, and had him more or less installed in her and ds's place from the early days of the relationship. They left my Nephew in the house on his own on Boxing Day to go to the pub. It is only a few doors away, and they apparently were gone for half an hour, but still, not acceptable. Nits, well, my ds kept getting them in school as there were kids in his class who had them and weren't being treated, but treat them you have to, otherwise it's awful. I was doing it constantly. I can imagine the worry for your Mum, but like my Sister, your Sister has to take responsibility herself. I imagine it's very hard as a single working Mum, but if your Sister is anything like mine, given too much help will only make her less responsible. My Sister abuses it and just leaves my Nephew with whoever will have him.

But what do you think? Do you think she genuinely isn't coping or that she would take the piss if say your mum helped out a bit more?
Maybe you/your mum could have a go at training the kids in looking after the house and helping out more. Help her set up some systems to keep organised, sometimes people just get stuck in a rut.
Also pop the occasional bottle of nit treatment in your trolley for them (TBH if her new fella has no kids of his own he might run a mile when he finds his first nit!)

she seems to have lost interest in her kids and its all me me me which is understandable at having a child at 18 and not being able to have the freedom to do what she wanted, maybe as they are older she feels she can do that little bit more (I don't know tbh sometimes I feel she should put them first on occasions sp? and think of herself after) she is getting rid of the kids when this bloke comes up, she even went shopping for new towels etc just to impress him my other sis has already given her nit cream and she run out so she used conditioner. My mum is getting on and has been unwell and already does enough for her but she feels my sister is at an age where she should be able to cope ie with money etc (mum is always bailing her out) and its annoying coz she goes on the drink and buys new clothes but she never hardly takes the kids anywhere and the cupboards are always bare or so my mum says