Don't want to post too much detail but I have just seen how, when a woman tries to leave a vile man, it is very easy to end up with a poor outcome because the legal systems in place are so shitty and inept and the checks and balances to stop women getting abused so lacking. I am so heartsore. I am in another country, so I hope it is better in the UK. I feel like it is. But for the record I now would advise:
Expect the absolute worst at every turn
Expect court orders to be flouted
Find a good lawyer, a GOOD one, who is sympathetic to your situation and committed to getting results (there are plenty of bluffers who will treat you as money in the bank)
Get support, so much support - practical, psychological, everything
Stockpile money, especially for legal bills, they will be huge
Never leave your house and kids for a second
Take everything you love and need if/when you ever do
Anyone else got some good advice for those who might be trying to make a break for freedom? I don't want to overwhelm or dishearten anyone but there is so much stuff that you can't know from the outside but really matters. If one other woman was able to protect herself I might feel less wrecked...