Am single seeing divorced man who is playing control games with me.

[multicoloredbleach]

I am seeing a man who lives abroad. I am fond of him in companion sense but get really fed up of his controlling games. He plays financial games of control with me. I am really stuck and limited in what I can say. He even had me watched via a private detective last year and now apologises about it but I know he doesn't mean it.

[multicoloredbleach]

I hope.

[summerwinterton]

And how much are the installments, has he actually paid you anything at all or is he just stringing you along?

[Belikethatthen]

Do you trust him to pay you back fully eventually?

If you are so worried about the blackmail, can you afford to write off the rest of the money? How much is that, £60-£70k? I only say that as I assume you are wealthy as you could lend him £100k and for peace of mind, it would be worth considering walking away.

[AyeAmarok]

How big are the instalments? How much longer of this have you got to go?

[mix56]

if he has had a Private investigator following you (apart from costing money !) what makes you think he hasn't put spyware on your computer/phone. Please log out of any cloud/msn/joint/phone tracker, & get computer/phone checked asap.

What if you tell him the tax man is asking questions, & you will need to tell them where the money is gone ?

[lljkk]

What is the blackmail material? OP doesn't mean the £100k = blackmail, does she?
My brain is screaming POLICE NOW but I don't understand, probably.

[tribpot]

Is this a dating fraud turned nasty, OP? Have you ever met this guy?

You're never getting that money back, I would guess he's paying you back just enough to make you think that if you stay compliant long enough he will.

What did the police say? Did you tell them the full story, or do you feel you can't tell them because your reasons for giving him the money 'to hold on your behalf' were not kosher to begin with?