Looking for strength....anyone experienced being in a long term relationship with a DP biding their time?

[petalpotter]

Feeling very low at the moment. Been with DP for many years and need to leave, though finding it very hard to.

Just looking for other people's experiences of being in a long term relationship where their DP was biding their time before leaving for another woman. Anyone care to share their experiences?

I think I am in this very situation.

I'm not sure, I could be. I bide my time by making the most of the time whilst I have a roof over my head.
If I were financially able, I would have left years ago.

I'm biding my time; 2 young DC & no family support. When youngest starts school in 2.5 years I'll reassess my options, get some counselling for myself & decide what's best.

My DP "checked out" years ago, in many ways.

Yup, me too. I'm not quite sure why I haven't left; probably a combination of not wanting to uproot dd, relative financial comfort, sentimentality and laziness. Dp checked out a while back and is unlikely to return. I've taken a while to come to terms with it (very long term relationship of 30plus years).

Join the club. I'm sure there's lots of us here.

When you say DP checked out, what does that mean? Cheating, absent, etc?

Petal, have lurked on your previous thread. I'm sorry that things are the same. I doubt that any advice here will make you feel any better either. You know what your DP is, and he won't change.

Only you can make the changes needed in order that you can move forward and be happy and confidant again. Good luck whenever you decide to do so.

petal was that question meant for me? I meant metaphorically; no interest in me, grudgingly coming on rare family holidays and then going home before the end, not coming home til 10 at night, and of course cheating, lying about it and minimising it. Physically, he's still here.