Facebook silliness. Who is right?

[NotGonnaAnswerThePhone]

Hi all, this is a very trivial one.

I have a dp who I have been with for 3 years, get on well with her family - her Sister can be a bit of a wind up.

Anyway, have been feeling down lately, came off anti depressants (which I was taking for anxiety rather than depression, Citalopram 20mg) I didn't come off them properly, just pretty much stopped taking them and recently I have been emotional and angry. Sometimes sensitive.

Anyway, I recently discovered that someone had bashed in the drivers side door of mt carm, a massive dent and scratches. Its an old car but its my first car and I have only been driving since June last year. I have had a few bumps in it but this one is a mystery.

So (as you do) I had a mini rant on Facebook saying how disappointed i felt that someone can do this and not have the decency to leave a note (naive?).

DP'S sister commented something like I was probably lying and I am a shit driver and probably bumped into someone and too scared to admit it. I replied saying that wasnt the case. Then she announced about the time I had left my handbreak up (it had broken) and it rolled across a busy street. I accept this happened and it was bad - luckily no one and nothing was hurt or damaged. Then "friends" replied to her comments with "lmao" etc. Basically everytime I post something on FB - particularly about driving, I get some snotty or rude response and last night I just thought - fuck it. I dont need FB in my life so I deactivated it.

Now this morning (DP works nights) DP has said that her sister is upset because she thinks I have blocked her on Facebook and that I need to text her to explain I have just deleted Facebook and not her. I said that I am not obliged to do this and I can delete social media sites as and when I want without having to explain!

Am I right? Should I stick to my guns and not text the Sister or message her to explain?

It annoys me that I was trying to make a point that I am not putting up with the shitty comments anymore and by doing so, I've now got to apologise to HER!?

I know stumbly

I told DP last night that I was deleting it. I really dont see the issue. Also, she could have quite easily turned to her husband/son/mother (all of which were on my FB) and asked if I was visible on there.

This always fucking happens.

I deleted it a few years back and colleagues were whispering and wondering why "I had blocked them all" FFS

Facebook has so many good points but also so so many bad ones

If you want to be on FB for whatever reason, then defriend DP's sister! She knows what she's been doing, and you don't owe DP or anyone else an explanation. Sure you can tell DP that her sister's is continually rude and belittling on your FB page, but only tell her once if you do, and then tell her you're not going to discuss it any more. YOu're entitled to have only people you like and who are respectful on your FB page. It's YOUR fb page.

you dont owe her an explanation i wouldnt bother with that. i doubt shes actually upset just a nosy bugger. if you want to delete fb fine but with people that piss me off that its tricky to delete (like family) i just put them on restricted.

I banter with my friends but i think most people know when they have gone too far and at that point need to stop it. Because if they dont then its not really banter and its just one (or more) person being a bit of a bellend to someone else.

I've been off the Citalorpam for a few months now so surely I am over the hard part? Hmm, maybe I should ring my GP. Can I just call and ask for a prescription or has it been too long? Would I have to be re-prescribed them?

I am definitely not myself but I do have stressfull things going on with work etc

Have just rang GP reception and they said I havent picked any tablets up for 3 months. I lied and said I had several packets I hadn't accounted for because I walys pick them up early. She has issued me with a rpescription and told me I must see a doctor before the tablets run out/

I do think I am being over sensitive maybe

Delete FB and things will improve in all aspects of your life.
FB is the biggest depressant in peoples lives.

How's it dangerous, greenwood? I am asking because my mum keeps coming on and off them despite me telling her off

gandalf, basically you go into withdrawal. It can cause things like irrational thoughts, or even flu/illness symptoms. I've never taken it, but a friend took it for years and then just stopped cold turkey. She couldn't sleep or eat - went to the GP, who told her off big time, and said you should never just come off it, but reduce dosage gradually.

Think you've over-reacted tbh...it's banter

That would explain a lot Thank you for taking the time to reply

summerlovin when does banter become just someone being an asshole?

Does this mean I can be a cunt to everyone and simply explain that its banter?

Woah notgonnaanswer ...if you turn around, go back over that line and straight on for a bit you'll probably find where it crossed over into being an asshole

Don't worry op I think that was summer attempt at bantaaaar

It sounds like they are winding you as they probably know your feeling a bit sensitive. Some folk are just dicks like that.

Ignore and don't feed it.

If you dp asks why you havnt apologised just say you do t have to apologise to anyone if you want to close your own facebook down.

Regardless her dsis. I would just act as if you think she is being incredibly silly even bringing it up. Just laugh at her with a 'wtf has she been sniffing' on your face. The min they think you are annoyed they will pick and pick at it.

Fuck her she sounds like a knob

I don't think it's banter - it's not funny, it's not clever, and it's quite rude and lacking in social grace. I think anyone might feel a bit upset about it, let alone someone who has just come of antidepressants. Now on that subject, you do realise you're supposed to taper down citalopram, right? You're not supposed to just come off it cold turkey! Please see your GP - sometimes it's the right thing to come of antidepressants, but other times we can be lulled into a false sense of security by the fact that the drugs are working and making us feel a bit better, and this makes us feel we no longer need them, but really we do.

Phone Did you actually tell her it upset you? My SIL and I rip the piss out of each other constantly! I'm winning currently but she'll get me soon However, if I ever upset her and she told me she was hurt I would be mortified. Not everyone has the same sense of humour and actually your drugs make no difference, even if they are making you over sensitive, because how you feel right now is what should count.

So. If you had not told her you were upset, you can perhaps see why she thought it was a mardy flounce off. Maybe you should call her and explain how hurt you were.

If she does know how upset you were and carried on regardless then she's not a very nice person and isn't worth your worry.

FWIW, I haven't got Facebook and I'm perfectly fine! Keep in touch with friends using Whatsapp and FaceTime-then you get the ones you want without the nosey Parkers who just want to lurk.

Sorry you've been so upset

I found the OP's response to my reasonably polite suggestion that s/he had over-reacted to be very aggressive. I answered the original question... I'm sorry I resorted to sarcastic 'banter'. People probably assume you are up for it if you rant about driving related things on FB. I posted something myself recently about someone parked right up to my bumper and a few people said that I was over the line and should learn how to park...err....no big deal? If you can't take a joke, you're right to get off FB...

I don't see whay you have to tell her. Why can't your DP just say, "No, she has deleted her whole account, not just you". SiL brings it up, you say "I felt fb was taking too much of my time so I decided to take a break". Job done, no more drama.

It sounds to me like your DP and her family are bullying you. Some people just can't let go if someone reacts to 'banter'. They are having fun at your expense.

Sometimes relationships get into a negative pattern and it sounds like you need to stand back from it and not react to their comments. They will hate it.

Op wasn't being aggressive to you. She was just asking a reasonable question about banter.

It's fucking ironic that you're telling her she can't take a joke and then massively overreacting to a perfectly normal post.

It wasn't banter.

It was a dig at OP and when she called them on it they basically called her a liar and said she did it herself.

It isn't the first time it happened and it wont be the last.

It is only banter if everyone thinks it is.

And yeah I agree banter is only banter if the other person finds it funny. Otherwise it's just bullying.

"If you dp asks why you havnt apologised just say you do t have to apologise to anyone if you want to close your own facebook down. "

This.

Why doesn't your DP just say "nah, nothing personal, Not has deleted FB"?

Making you text her is just off.

DH has an account he's used twice. Anyone says to me "oh, he didn't reply to my friend request" or whatever, I don't stay silent and ask him to text, I say "yeah, he's never on it". Discussion over!

Nope doesn't sound like banter. Don't get in contact with the SIL.